Eric Holder Hallucinates in Public

The Attorney General of the United States is seeing things that are not there.

Attorney General Eric Holder declared Monday that the Justice Department is on the lookout for acts of violence or discrimination that signal a backlash to the Boston Marathon bombings earlier this month in which three people were killed and scores wounded.

"Our investigation into this matter remains ongoing – and I want to assure you that my colleagues and I are determined to hold accountable, to the fullest extent of the law, all of those who were responsible for this attack," Holder said, according to the prepared text of a speech delivered Monday to the Anti-Defamation League. "But I also want to make clear that – just as we will pursue relentlessly anyone who would target our people or attempt to terrorize our cities – the Justice Department is firmly committed to protecting innocent people against misguided acts of retaliation."

There is no backlash and there won't be a backlash. Holder's probably looking for a way to classify the bombing as "sportsplace violence" even as I write this.

Holder continued with his prepared remarks.

"In the dozen years since 9/11, this commitment has led the department to investigate more than 800 incidents involving threats, assaults, and acts of vandalism and violence targeting Muslims, Arabs, Sikhs, South Asians, and others who are perceived to be members of these groups," Holder continued. "As Americans, we must not allow any group to be stigmatized or alienated. Except those bitter clinger Republican bastards in the South, who keep putting their guns and ancient religion ahead of the commonsense yet ineffective laws we keep coming up with to keep anyone from focusing for very long on the economy or the unfolding disasters in foreign policy. Those people, you can abuse and malign all you want."

I may have made those last two sentences up, but they're accurate anyway.