The PJ Tatler » Jeff Durstewitz

Unemployment going up …

Jeff Durstewitz — Fri, 08 Jul 2011 17:29:38 +0000

… after $1 trillion in borrowed “stimulus.”As certified NYTimes genius Paul “Kruggles” Krugman says, we probably just need to borrow and spend another $2 or $3 trillion to get our stupid economy to conform to brilliant leftist orthodoxy. Just like throwing more money at welfare and the schools! It’s not a matter of whether, but of how much!

Still, my faith in the transcendent brilliance of O is unshaken. And I’m sure his own faith is unshaken, too. How about you?

Ballad of Pretty Boy Johnny the Outlaw

Jeff Durstewitz — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 19:38:23 +0000

Well gather round you children,
A story I will tell.
About Pretty Boy Johnny Edwards,
Carolina knew him well.

He spoke of two Americas,
He lied between his teeth.
He combed his hair a hundred times,
With nothing underneath.

He built a mansion high,
And deceived his dying wife.
He betrayed his closest ones,
To better his own life.

He reached for the White House,
All seemed within his grasp.
But while taking campaign funds,
A young mistress he did clasp.

So now he’s a defendant,
And looking rather glum.
But tell us Pretty Boy Johnny,
Did you have to be so dumb?

(With apologies to Woody Guthrie, even though he probably would have voted for Edwards)

Jour de Gloire?

Jeff Durstewitz — Fri, 20 May 2011 16:10:38 +0000

Our sources in the French military say elite commandos of the republic’s feared Marseillaise unit are preparing to launch a daring Abbottabad-style raid to spring Socialist hero and accused sex offender Dominique Strauss-Kahn from durance vile in Manhattan. But although they know exactly where the international man of intrigue is being held, his rescue will have to wait. It seems even the military isn’t exempt from the Socialists’ brilliant 35-hour workweek, which has slowed training.

Patience, DSK!