Four days in and we haven’t spun out of orbit yet. COULD IT BE THAT HE WAS MAKING ALL OF THAT UP?!?!?
Being fat sucks. Getting fat is awesome.
— Ben Howe (@BenHowe) March 5, 2013
DC hookers now offering the Sequester Special, where for an extra hundred bucks they’ll pretend like it hurts.
— Stephen Green (@VodkaPundit) March 4, 2013
Going to physically wear myself out so I don’t punch a bitch. Namaste. Or whatever.
— Chelsea (@chelseagrunwald) March 5, 2013