Now as an older screenwriter myself I know what you’re thinking. Wrong demographics. Who wants to make a movie filled with old people? They’re all staying home watching Downton Abbey. But as you and I know, that’s a canard. Because of the nature of the Obama administration, All the President’s Dudes would be filled with, well, dudes and, naturally, dudettes. Half of Obama’s speechwriters are barely old enough to drive. Except for the reliable Chicago crew, POTUS doesn’t seem to enjoy surrounding himself with equals. He’s a little insecure. But we can keep that between us. You don’t have to put it in the movie. Just concentrate on the dudes and dudettes, letting them do what the hormone-infused young do, and casting will handle the rest. Rest assured they’ll ignore the cliche about Washington being Hollywood for ugly people. You can even do a little vicarious living of your own in the process.
So what do you think? Do we have a deal? If not, I have a possible sweetener. As you know, Press Secretary Jay Carney has been having a little difficulty lately dealing with the truth. In your 1983 Adventures in the Screen Trade, you coined what may be the most famous phrase about Hollywood ever — “Nobody Knows Anything.” Why not make that about politics and have Carney repeat it endlessly? The phrase could then be employed by every press secretary from now into the future. It might be the ultimate stonewall, but it could save everybody a lot of wasted effort.