You left out something that flew under the news radar:

As part of his 2010 budget, listed under Other/Miscellaneous/You’ve-to-to-be-kidding expenses, President Obama — with Swifty Orszag’s approval — personally purchased a credit-default swap as a hedge on his pledge to ‘halve’ the annual deficit in four years. If Obama fails to do so, AIG will pay him $20 billion. If AIG can’t once again cover the bet — no sweat — that’s what taxpayers four years from now are for.

If you too want in on Obama’s CDS action go to obamathefisalclown dot gov, click on the Vinny da AIG Bookie icon, and follow the instructions.

On the same website, you can order the home taxpayer version of Timmy G’s 50% of all profits/none of the losses Hungry Hippos eat Toxic Assets game — for only three easy payments of $60 billion. It’s way more fun than Parcheesi or even Battling Tops.

If that’s a little bit out of your reach, go to obamatheforeignpolicyclown dot gov and sponsor a drone missile for only $5 billion. If your sponsored drone missile is used in Afghanipakistan, in addition to a handsome wall plaque, you’ll receive trophy body parts to commemorate your contribution to the war on terror. I sponsored one for myself and gave one as a gift. My sponsored drone missile was used last week, yay! And Fed-Ex just dropped off a box containing part of a skull cap with some hair still attached, a few teeth imbedded in a chunk of concrete (looks just like a museum fossil!), and what looks to be a kid’s left arm. The Certificate of Authenticity stated they were all Taliban body parts.