When O says to the mullahs if you help me in the Stans
I will look the other way and let you formulate your plans
To rid the world and people of a certain you know who
Just be sure you don’t inform me so I won’t know what you do
The mullahs smile and say sure Jack just tell us what you want
And O winks back and says he just needs something he can flaunt
To show the public back at home he’s really on the ball
I’ve got to give them something big that’s why I make this call
The guys I’ve got, the money men, he said with great disdain
Are causing polling numbers to go circling round the drain
So what I need is access to the Afghan seat of war
I need your ports, I need your roads, I need your help much more
Than I could state in simple terms because it’s so complex
And if you give me what I need I think we’ll clear the decks
For you to gain complete control of what you say is yours
And in the process make Israelis grovel on all fours
To grovel them is not our goal the mullahs winked and laughed
No doubt you think us crazy and no doubt you think us daft
But total ’nihilation is what this is all about
We don’t want them to holler and we don’t want them to shout
We want the sons of pigs and dogs in silent heaps to lay
So that is what we want and are you now prepared to pay
Done and done said O as he prepared to board his plane
I don’t know what you’re gonna do but if my numbers gain
You scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours and when I leave the room
I’ll know you’ve kept your bargain when I’ve heard that great big boom