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Guess What This California Wife Did With Pop Rocks To End Up in the ER…

Saturday, May 17th, 2014 - by Stephen Green

Yikes:

A frisky California wife ended up in the ER after she put exploding candy into her genitals during sex.

The unnamed woman, from Newport Beach, reportedly thought inserting the tingling Pop Rocks confectionery into her vagina would increase her pleasure.

But the sweet treat actually had the opposite effect, and she started suffering burning and itching sensations.

You know you’re not supposed to…

…oh, who am I to judge?

ALSO: The video is a TLC dramatization and not the actual ER visit or anything else.

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What Kind of Man Would Want to Date Lorena Bobbitt?

Monday, May 5th, 2014 - by Stephen Green

cutyn

If you were looking for a story to disprove the old notion that men are stupid and women are crazy, then this is not your story:

Lorena Bobbitt, who made world headlines after chopping off her husband’s manhood and throwing it away in a park, has revealed she didn’t have any problems getting a date afterwards.

Twenty-one years after slicing husband John Wayne’s penis off with a kitchen knife Lorena revealed: “Believe it or not, I had quite a few gentlemen that wanted to date me.”

I got nothin’.

****
Cross-posted from Vodkapundit

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Shocking Baltimore Video: A Dozen Cars Devoured As Street Collapses Into Ravine

Friday, May 2nd, 2014 - by PJ Lifestyle Viral Videos

Via Mashable:

A possible landslide swallowed nearly a dozen cars on a street in Baltimore on Thursday morning, when one side of the street suddenly slid into a ravine and onto the train tracks below.

Witnesses say the street shook shortly after 3:30 p.m. ET on Wednesday before half of the street “collapsed into the pit” across the street.

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Courtney Love Thinks She Has Found The Missing Malaysian Plane

Tuesday, March 18th, 2014 - by Chris Queen

Courtney

Technology affords us the ability to take part in the news on a minute by minute basis — sometimes to a fault. Rocker Courtney Love has turned aviation expert and breaking news journalist and revealed her thoughts on Malaysian Airlines Flight 370:

Love says she thinks she may have found the plane using the web site Tomnod to view satellite images of the search area.

Love took to her Twitter account to announce the findings.

She points to what she says is an oil slick on one of the images.

Love claims the slick is located about a mile away from Pulau Perak, the last place the plane was tracked.

Here’s her twitter post:

Courtneytweet

When a follower disputed her claim, she provided photographic evidence:

Bi6mCbxCIAAbJo7

Who knows? Courtney Love may be on to something, but only if she can get someone to do a physical search of the area.

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Our Bodies, Our Only Sense of Self

Thursday, March 13th, 2014 - by Susan L.M. Goldberg

belleknox

The MSM’s latest fetish, college girls-turned-porn stars for tuition money, smacks of the rotten legacy of second-wave feminism’s “our bodies, our selves” mantra. Take the story of Belle Knox, a Duke University fresh-girl forced to do porn for the tuition money. While her sleaze-bag of an agent attempts to milk her 15 minutes with stories of a poor girl turned out by multimillionaire parents (a story she later changed when chatting with Piers Morgan), Belle Knox views herself as anything but a victim.

The 18-year-old appeared on front pages across the globe and sat down with Piers Morgan for a CNN interview using only her stage name and claiming that she was not ashamed of what she was doing and, in fact, felt ‘empowered’ by her career.

I’m not being exploited. I love what I’m doing and I’m safe,’ insists the women’s studies major.

Women’s studies major. Good thing she’s in porn, considering her future career choices at this point don’t rise far above McDonald’s worker (and we all know how poorly they’re paid). Seriously, though, paying for your women’s studies degree by doing porn? Has anyone stopped being sucked in by the rich-girl lifestyle to consider that glaring irony? Or the fact that her women’s studies major has justified her career choice?

She told her student newspaper in an interview last week: ‘My entire life, I have, along with millions of other girls, been told that sex is a degrading and shameful act. When I was five-years-old and beginning to discover the wonders of my body, my mother, completely horrified, told me that if I masturbated, my vagina would fall off.

‘The most striking view I was indoctrinated with was that sex is something women “have,” but that they shouldn’t “give it away” too soon -– as though there’s only so much sex in any one woman, and sex is something she does for a man that necessarily requires losing something of herself, and so she should be really careful who she “gives” it to.’

The vapid meanderings of Belle Knox illustrate the very scary impact of the second-wave feminist notion that our bodies really are our selves. Beyond our physicality, we have nothing left, no brain, no feeling, to “lose” or invest in a sexual encounter.

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Why the Non-Stop Punchline Shouldn’t Come as a Surprise

Tuesday, March 4th, 2014 - by Susan L.M. Goldberg

Mega spoiler alert regarding the new Liam Neeson flick Non-Stop via Breitbart. Stop reading now if you’d like to be surprised when you go to the theater to see Lady Mary on the big screen.

The hero of the movie about a plane being hijacked is an observant Muslim.

Wait, it gets better.

The terrorist is a 9/11 family member. Yes, you read that right; the terrorist is a 9/11 family-member who lost a loved-one in the World Trade Center on that terrible September morning.

It gets worse…

After 9/11,  this 9/11 family member-turned-terrorist then joined the military but found himself disillusioned by the pointless wars.

And now…

The 9/11 family member-turned-terrorist is upset because America hasn’t done enough to ensure there will never be another 9/11. And so he figures that if he can get an air marshal blamed for a terrorist attack, America will wake up and anally probe us before we’re allowed on a plane, or something.

It gets worse…

The villain’s sidekick is a member of the American military willing to murder 150 innocent people for a payday.

It gets worse…

The one passenger on the plane who is forever helpful, kind, reasonable, noble, and never under suspicion is a Muslim doctor dressed in traditional Muslim garb including a full beard.

Screw you, Hollywood.

Wikipedia’s summary of the film had a kinder, gentler, more bureaucratic approach to the biased plotline:

…as soldiers who were appalled by the lack of security at U.S. airports before 9/11, they hoped that framing [Neeson] as a terrorist will lead to drastically increased security.

Great. A propaganda film that uses the American military to advocate for the increased empowerment of the TSA. What next? A film featuring American soldiers deployed on the edge of the communist world spending their precious time dressing up in drag, defending  gay rights on base? (Cue musical number Springtime for Obama.)

As bizarre as it may seem, the plotline of Non Stop shouldn’t come as a surprise. Liam Neeson, the film’s star, has been contemplating converting to Islam since filming Taken 2 in Istanbul in 2012:

Movie star Liam Neeson has admitted he’s afraid to convert to Islam because of how locals in his home town would take it.

The Northern Irish actor thinks Islam “is the answer” after experiencing the Muslim call to prayer while filming Taken 2 in Istanbul.

But the 61-year-old doesn’t want to go all the way because people in Ballymena, Co Antrim, may be annoyed with his decision.

…“It wouldn’t go down very well in Ballymena.

“They would say to me, ‘You’re a Muslim? Are you a Catholic Muslim or a Protestant Muslim?’ ”

Perhaps he’ll be able to answer that question in Non Stop 2. Having edged out Son of God for top rating at the box office this weekend, it doesn’t look like the blatantly anti-American tone will disappear anytime soon, despite the lackluster ratings. Casting suggestion for the sequel: Katy Perry as the flight attendant demonstrating an appropriate use of a Muslim pendant as a non-blasphemous work-wardrobe accessory. It’d be nice to see her cover up for a change.

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The New Hipster Trend – Beard Transplants

Thursday, February 27th, 2014 - by Chris Queen

Hipster beard

The scientific advancements we’ve seen the last few years stagger the imagination. Among these revolutions in the medical realm is the hair transplant. But, lest you think hair transplants are only for the guys you see on local television ads with a sad visage in a “before” image and a convertible and a hot babe in the “after” shot, one group of guys is taking advantage of hair transplant technology in a new way. The latest trend in the hipster world is the beard transplant:

Stubble-challenged guys are forking over up to $8,500 for the beard-boosting procedure, which has spiked in popularity in recent months, plastic surgeons told The Post.

“Brooklyn is probably the nucleus of the trend, it’s the hipster ‘look’ guys want. If you have a spotty beard, and you let it grow out, it looks sloppy, ” said Dr. Jeffrey Epstein, a Midtown-based plastic surgeon.

“[Clients] want full beards because it’s a masculine look. Beards are an important male identifier,” he added.

I guess these hipster guys need a “male identifier” to counter the decidedly non-masculine look of the deep v-neck t-shirts and skinny jeans rolled up too high. In a lovely bit of irony, some hipsters make use of the transplants to look older:

One happy patient  is Danny, 27, whose beard used to be so patchy, he was forced to “fill it in” with an eyebrow pencil, he said.

Two years ago, he paid $8,500 for the surgery, which he considers a fashion statement.

“I have a baby face but now I’m able to look older. My fashion statement is a little edgy, and I do like the ‘rugged look,’” he said.

He added, “It’s one of the best investments I’ve ever made.”

While others go for the procedure to look younger:

A 39-year-old New Yorker, who works in catering industry,  got a beard transplant to make him feel younger, DNAinfo.com reported.

“I had contemplated [getting a beard transplant] for approximately eight months,” he said, “Knowing the results, I wish I hadn’t wasted so much time deciding,” he said.

$8,500 for facial hair. Sometimes, the jokes just write themselves.

 (h/t to Kathy Shaidle)

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The New Morality Makes Animals of Us All

Wednesday, February 26th, 2014 - by Susan L.M. Goldberg

deadbirds

First exhibited at the prestigious Paris Salon in 1765, Jean-Baptiste Greuze’s ”A Girl With a Dead Canary” was designed to evoke much the same emotion as PETA member Sarah Segal’s proposed memorial to chickens who were killed in a truck accident last month in Georgia. It seems like a tacky comparison that may even be read as an insult to a well-done and even pretty (if bizarre) work of 18th century art, but the bottom line is that both pieces were created for the same purpose: To tug at viewers’ heartstrings while affirming the moral superiority of a particular cultural class.

According to British historian Simon Schama, ill-fated French King Louis XVI introduced the “cult of nature” to the throne, “replacing couches and courtisans with [the] tenderness and simplicity” of Marie Antoinette’s toy farm and the well-crafted embrace of wildlife in art. “Tears were especially prized as evidence of feeling,” Schama explains, noting that, “people wept when they saw” Greuze’s painting. “Feelings …the shallow kind were embraced by the fashionable elite.” It was the attempt of a king and class to portray themselves as perfect, superior human beings.

So it goes with the Roadkill Memorial, albeit in a much more blatantly political format. A tombstone designed to dwarf roadside memorials to mere human victims of vehicular death, the proposed memorial is intended to remind all drivers to approach all of their animal relations with reverence:

Cascada said the tombstone’s visibility would make drivers’ more wary of people and chickens alike, thereby helping to avoid unnecessary accidents and preserve the lives of chickens in transport. …But Cascada acknowledged the reality of the chickens’ final destination, making the “Go Vegan” phrase a key takeaway.

“The more people who go vegan, the fewer chickens are in this situation to begin with,” she said.

Simply stating that “meat is murder” isn’t enough anymore. For PETA, the time for mere sloganeering is over. Humans are animals, don’t you get it? You’re all slabs of meat now, and some are much more important than others.

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The Crisis You Won’t Hear About In The Mainstream Media: A National Clown Shortage!

Wednesday, February 19th, 2014 - by Chris Queen

Clowns

In an era where problems abound – issues like the threat of a nuclear Iran, runaway federal spending, and an overreaching executive branch – it’s important to focus on the most urgent crises facing this country: a potential nationwide clown shortage! Fortunately, the New York Daily News is on top of it for all of us in this exclusive report:

As the “Greatest Show on Earth” returns to Brooklyn Thursday, circus folk fear a national clown shortage is on the horizon.

Membership at the country’s largest trade organizations for the jokesters has plunged over the past decade as declining interest, old age and higher standards among employers align against Krusty, Bozo and their crimson-nosed colleagues.

“What’s happening is attrition,” said Clowns of America International President Glen Kohlberger, who added that membership at the Florida-based organization has plummeted since 2006. “The older clowns are passing away.”

Membership at the World Clown Association, the country’s largest trade group for clowns, has dropped from about 3,500 to 2,500 since 2004.

Of course the clowning industry (and I can’t believe I just used that phrase) knows the solution to their problem – getting more kids and teens to consider clowning as a career.

“The challenge is getting younger people involved in clowning,” said Association President Deanna (Dee Dee) Hartmier, who said most of her members are over 40.

Kohlberger said that it’s difficult getting younger people who develop an early interest in the many facets of clowning to stick with it on the professional level.

“What happens is they go on to high school and college and clowning isn’t cool anymore,” he said. “Clowning is then put on the back burner until their late 40s and early 50s.”

Cyrus Zavieh, the president of New York Clown Alley, a group that boasts 45 members across the New York area, said clowns can pull in up to $300 for a birthday party — but that’s hardly a financial incentive for many young people.

“American kids these days are thinking about different careers altogether,” said Zavieh, 44, who has worked under the moniker Cido for nearly two decades.

“They’re thinking about everything other than clowning.”

It’s up to this generation of parents to reverse this alarming trend. Instead of encouraging your sons and daughters to become doctors or lawyers or grooming them to carry on the family business, why not gently nudge them toward the noble art of clowning? We know from the clowning associations that it’s a challenging, multi-faceted, and rewarding career. Think about the joy you’d have as a parent watching your child entertaining thousands at The Greatest Show on Earth! Or imagine your pride as the clown you raised makes a little one scream and cower in fear.

None of us want to have to say one day in the future, “Remember clowns?” Don’t let these delightful entertainers become extinct. Don’t let clowning go the way of the Victrola or the black and white console television. Now is the time to ensure the future of clowning for future generations. For the children.

Unless clowns creep you or your kids out. In that case, never mind.

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China’s #1 Professional Punching Bag

Thursday, February 13th, 2014 - by Stephen Green

PUNCHING BAG

Um:

Xie Shuipeng, a trim 48-year-old with a broad smile, has a dream that one day Mike Tyson will punch him.

After ten years working the nightclub circuit, Mr Xie has won fame as China’s number one human punchbag, able to withstand a blow of any strength.

He advertises his services to anyone frustrated with life. “If you are upset by your boss or your wife, don’t blame them! Vent your anger on me! Let society be harmonious,” his flier states.

On neon-lit stages, Mr Xie offers free drinks to anyone who can hit him so hard he steps backwards across a yellow line on the ground.

“I tell them only to punch me in the belly, but sometimes they insist on punching me in the chest or even hitting me over the head with a glass bottle,” he said.

You know you’re not supposed to do… aw, hell — he makes a good living at it.

*****

Cross-posted from Vodkapundit

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PETA Wants A Memorial In Georgia To Honor Auto Accident Victims

Friday, February 7th, 2014 - by Chris Queen

GainesvilleChickenMemorial

Gainesville, Georgia, about an hour north of Atlanta, has earned the reputation as the “Poultry Capital of the World.” Thousands of chickens make their way through Gainesville on their way to and from the processing plants throughout Northeast Georgia. With so many chickens in transit, there was bound to be an accident involving a chicken truck at some point. On January 27, a truck carrying live chickens overturned on a highway in Gainesville.

When humans die in automobile accidents, we often see makeshift memorials at the crash site. The Georgia Department of Transportation (GDOT) has begun placing state-approved memorials at sites for a $100 fee at the request of family members. PETA has stepped in, petitioning GDOT for a memorial to the chickens killed in the January 27 crash.

The drivers of the chicken truck and the other vehicle involved were not seriously injured in the predawn crash on U.S. 129 near Gainesville, but “dozens” of the truck’s cargo were apparently not so fortunate, according to the local PETA member who filed the request for a “giant tombstone” to be erected in memory of the chickens.

“Although a relative of the deceased is usually required to fulfill requests for roadside memorials, I hope you will allow a concerned citizen such as me to suffice in this case,” Sarah Segal of Atlanta wrote in her application to GDOT. “These chickens, who spent their entire short lives … on a factory farm before their agonizing deaths, have no known living relatives.”

A spokeswoman for PETA has stated that the memorial will serve as “food for thought” to Gainesville’s residents and travelers in the area. Of course, with the poultry industry employing thousands of residents in the region, Gainesville is likely to view the monument as an object of ridicule and the publicity stunt that it really is. There’s no word yet on the state’s response to the request.

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Stripping Down for the Motherland

Monday, February 3rd, 2014 - by Susan L.M. Goldberg
Russia1

Freestyle skier Ekaterina Stolyarova

 

In the best PR stunt since Putin’s shirtless hunting and fishing expedition, Russia’s female Olympic athletes have stripped down to welcome the world to Sochi.

The country that used to permit the performance of “Can’t Buy Me Love” on the grounds that it was a song critical of prostitution in the West has no problem pimping out its female athletes to soften its rather uptight image ahead of the Olympic Games. The salacious images portray female athletes in poses more typical of lingerie models, pole dancers, and strippers than skiers, curlers and hockey players.

Russian male athletes have yet to pony up to the cameras and bare near-all.

When asked how photos of nearly naked female athletes will quell the concerns surrounding the Sochi games, including “disputes about homophobia, world leaders refusing to attend, and mega-security  at Sochi,” the response received was: “It is democratic to look at half naked women. Women are beautiful.  Everyone likes a pretty girl. Which is why we send ugly ones to Siberia.”

Russia2

Curler Ekaterina Galkina

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Obama’s Great Jewish Conspiracy That Isn’t

Tuesday, January 28th, 2014 - by Susan L.M. Goldberg
bibiobama

Typical mainstream media disinformation campaign …bet the “Joos” are behind it; their leader, Bibi, loves to be called “King”.

 Last Thursday, Seth Mandel at Commentary covered a disturbing news report featured in the Jerusalem Post:

A US official close to President Barack Obama and Secretary of State John Kerry said both men are disturbed over what is being perceived in their inner circle as “Jewish activism in Congress” that they think is being encouraged by the Israeli government, Israel Radio reported on Thursday.

The official has informed Israeli government figures that the president and secretary of state are disappointed over repeated attacks made against them by leading members of the Jewish community in the US.

According to Israel Radio, Israeli diplomats and foreign officers have warned against this trend. According to officials based in foreign missions, the Israeli government is increasingly being viewed as fanning the flames among American Jews by encouraging them to promote the official government position while making no room for opposing viewpoints.

FrontPage Magazine, the Weekly Standard , and Breitbart were among the bigger conservative sources to pick up on the story, but that’s not surprising. The shocker is the lack of coverage on the part of left-wing Jewish-American news sources, like the Forward and Tablet Magazine. Even the non-partisan Jewish Telegraphic Agency has failed to cover the story that, as Tom Wilson at Commentary succinctly explains, has extremely plausible grounding in the scenario of current peace talks.

So much for an Israel lobby on American shores. The “Joos” who are supposedly taking orders from Israel don’t even bother to say a word to defend their dreaded Lord and Master Zion in the face of the Obama administration’s aggression. Guess they didn’t get the memo.

The one Jewish American response that hasn’t come from a conservative news source was written by a former Forward editor …and published in Israel’s left-wing Ha’aretz. Commenting on Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper’s address to the Knesset, former Forward editor and current editor of the New York Sun Seth Lipsky writes:

The American leader is sending out word that he is “disturbed” by “Jewish activism in Congress” against his administration’s entente with Iran. Obama and Secretary of State Kerry, according to Israel Radio, are even blaming Prime Minister Netanyahu’s government for encouraging Jewish leaders to criticize the White House. We haven’t had this tone since President George H.W. Bush carped about being “one lonely little guy” beset by the Israel lobby.

Obama’s message hints at the kind of double-dual-loyalty libel that Harper confronted so bluntly in articulating the basis of the policies that have made him the most pro-Israel premier outside Jerusalem. …

…What is so striking about Harper’s speech is not the ardent expressions of friendship — all recent American presidents, including Obama, have done the same. Particularly George W. Bush, who, in the well of the Knesset, spoke of the “Chosen People” and called the Jewish state “the redemption of an ancient promise given to Abraham and Moses and David.” What is striking about Harper’s speech is the willingness to confront political correctness and call the hostility to Israel for what it is.

That’s what makes Israel the “holy land”: 2 Jews with 3 opinions can still manage to agree on 1 thing: Political correctness can’t mask blatant hostility towards Israel.

If only the American Jews would get the memo. After all, my fellow politically conservative Jews and I can’t be the only ones bringing food to the “We’ve Conquered the World” after-party.

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Rolling Stone, Privately Traded Company, Advocates Millennials Share the Wealth

Thursday, January 9th, 2014 - by Susan L.M. Goldberg

rollingstone

My  colleague Walter Hudson recently ripped into the ignorance of Jesse A. Meyerson’s  Occupy-hipster treatise, “Five Economic Reforms Millennials Should Be Fighting For.” The article was published in Rolling Stone magazine, the flagship publication of Wenner Media, a privately owned company. To clarify: ”Privately held companies are not required to file financial disclosure documents with government regulators such as the SEC, so detailed financials usually are not readily available to the public.”

In other words, the publisher of the magazine that prints articles informing readers they should advocate for:

  • “Job guarantees” through the non-profit (i.e. taxpayer funded) sector
  • A “universal basic income” funded through (taxpayer-based) Social Security
  • The creation of a “simple land-value tax”
  • A taxpayer-funded “sovereign wealth fund”
  • Taxpayer-funded state-owned public banks

doesn’t need to tell you one darn thing about the amount of taxes they do (or don’t) pay. Who knows? Wenner Media might just qualify as one of Meyerson’s despised “megacorporations”. The fact that the company’s co-founder, Rolling Stone publisher Jann Wenner, is worth a cool $700 million makes you think twice, unless you’re some twentysomething hack who has a proclivity for overusing the word “blow.” Did the editors have to cut out his Beavis and Butthead-like chuckles from the text? No wonder the guy is advocating for a government-funded job watering that fern in his Williamsburg apartment (or, as he prefers to call it, “urban farming”); the only reason he managed to swing a writing gig is because he’s a glorified mouthpiece for the same yuppie political hucksters he claims to be fighting against. That’s right, Meyerson’s a Tool for the Machine. Huh-huh-huh, I said tool.

Forget the fact that the guy who thinks we have an unemployment problem because available jobs are “menial” and “boring” is also the same guy who believes putting every adult on an auto-pay system will actually improve individual well-being, stimulate the economy, and spark a cultural renaissance in “painting murals.” You can’t reason with stupid. You can only laugh at the irony of a Marxist hippie ideology being parroted in a magazine created by a Marxist hippie that has become a pathetic homage to ideas so dense and ridiculous that their owners, like Jann Wenner, long ago left them in the dustbin to pursue successful truths, like capitalism, the free market, and the ability to own private corporations.

Congratulations, kid, you’ve been duped. But at least Mr. Wenner and the 30% of Rolling Stone readers whose income exceeds $100,000 a year were kind enough to redistribute some of their money your way.

Working sure feels good, doesn’t it?

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Girl Freezes Her Tongue to a Flagpole

Tuesday, January 7th, 2014 - by Chris Queen

Maddie Gilmartin

As much of the nation finds itself gripped by frigid weather, we shouldn’t be surprised to hear of people doing dumb things in the cold. Maddie Gilmartin of East Kingston, NH, discovered firsthand what happens when someone sticks his or her tongue to a flagpole in subfreezing temperatures. Needless to say, it’s a stunt she won’t try again.

“It just kind of popped into my head, hey what would happen if I stuck my tongue to a flag pole. At the moment I was like it will come right off,” Maddie said.

It didn’t.

“I’m stuck here in the middle of our yard just trying to get help,” Maddie said.

With her dad snow plowing at the end of the drive way here mom inside, Maddie tried pulling herself free.

“I see her standing at the flag pole her arms are waving and I’m not sure what’s going on until I got closer,” said Shawn Gilmartin, Maddie’s father. “She tried to pull her tongue off of it as soon as it happened and that’s what made it bleed. I had my hands cupped I was blowing, breathing on her lips and tongue.”

“I was just like, did I really just do that to myself, like did I really do just do that?” Maddie said.

Maddie was stuck on the flag pole for a full 15 minutes before being freed and then taken to the ER. Fortunately, she is going to be OK.

Gilmartin admitted she had never seen A Christmas Story, so she didn’t know about the infamous “sinister triple dog dare” scene. Cold compresses and ibuprofen will cure her sore tongue.

Her father is glad she wasn’t hurt worse and that she learned her lesson. What advice does she have for anyone who might be inclined to try a similar stunt?

“Just think before you do something,” Maddie said.

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U.S. Concentration Camps on Pravda’s List of Top 10 in 2013

Monday, January 6th, 2014 - by Susan L.M. Goldberg

obamacamps

The Russian daily Pravdafamous for being the preferred rag of the Communist Party and “official organ of the Soviet Union from 1918-1991″, in a unique act of disinformation has attributed “concentration camps” and “secret judgments” to the United States of America:

“The U.S. has a system of control and repression that consists of secret institutions (secret judgments, concentration camps) contrary to the U.S. Constitution. None of U.S. presidents (starting with Bush) have accepted the political responsibility for the establishment and operation of the system. Snowden’s revelations destroyed the myth of the U.S. as a country of democratic values serving as a model for civilization.”

The remark, published in an article titled “Looking Back at 2013: The Top Ten Most Important Events,” illustrates the fact that the KGB acts of framing and disinformation are still alive and well in the post-Cold War era:

“Even the deep crisis of the Roman Catholic Church shows that the abscess is opened, and liberal values ​​promoted by the West have met a proper pushback in all parts of the world. Russia is entering the New Year in a greatly consolidated position, which cannot be said about the United States.”

Victories for Russia included Putin’s role in American-Syrian relations, the continuance of military-technical and oil contracts with Venezuela, and the achievement of nuclear negotiations with Iran resulting in loosened American sanctions on the radical Islamist state.

Dubbing the Boston Marathon bombing “a provocation to justify the total surveillance of NSA” Pravda also observed, “Reflections after the fact, after revelations of Snowden, make you think that either NSA operates inefficiently with all the totality of its surveillance, which proves the vulnerability of America to terrorists…”.

The word “pravda” translates to “truth” in Russian.

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Nazi Is the New Sexy

Tuesday, December 10th, 2013 - by Susan L.M. Goldberg

tilatequilahitler

D-List reality star Tia Tequila has re-branded herself as Hitia Tequila in a move to give Adolf Hitler the voice she feels he so rightly deserves.

Based on the celebrity’s YouTube video playlist, the decision comes after releasing a year’s worth of conspiracy theory videos, a.k.a. “Truth Vlogs,” in which the Singaporean-born American model “exposes” the Freemasons, the Bildebergers, the Illuminati, and various groups employing “mind control” techniques including “Hollywood“.

Dubbing herself “the Goddess of Love and War” Tequila posted, ““I am She, the Queen who hath come to save you from this dark world filled with NWO [New World Order] parasite invaders,” on Facebook this past Monday. The description captioned a photograph of Tequila wearing an S.S. hat and Nazi armband while posing in front of the Nazi death camp Auschwitz.

Responding to fan criticism, Tequila clarified:

I am not going to sit here and say that I hate Jewish people because that is not the case nor is this about Jews… It is about Hitler and his side of the story that was never told since he was not the victor. However, those of you with a closed mind can think I am being anti-semite all you want because I already told you that I am not, nor will I repeat myself again.

Reports also indicate that “Tequila also refers to herself as “Hitila” in a new song she posted online on Sunday, which features the lyrics, ‘Jewluminati motherf*ckers hate me,’ and, ‘Worldwide genocide, blame it on the Jews.’”

Tequila’s “conversion” to Nazism comes 2 years after her conversion to Judaism, and one year after suffering a brain aneurysm after a drug overdose, and revealing that “…she suffers from Dissociative Identity Disorder, claimed her Twitter page was ‘hacked’ by her alter ego Jane, who, she described on her MySpace page as ‘crazy’ and someone who ‘always wants to kill me.’”

Jane was not available for comment at time of publication.

Tequila’s sexification of Nazism is the latest in a pop culture trend stretching back to Nazi exploitation films made popular in Italy in the 1970s. Last year’s San Diego Comic-Con welcomed Hot Nazi Chicks promoting Iron Sky, a sci-fi thriller about Nazi aliens attacking America from their home base on the dark side of the moon. There is no word yet on whether or not the Illuminati, Bildebergers, or Freemasons were responsible for the writing of the script.

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Satanists Want A Monument In Oklahoma Alongside 10 Commandments

Monday, December 9th, 2013 - by Chris Queen

Satan goes after the Ten Commandments

Jews and Christians have this crazy tendency to make themselves lighting rods for criticism and attack when they make their beliefs public. People really take offense to dangerous values like “Don’t murder” and “Don’t steal.” From militant atheists clamping down on anything related to Christmas and Hanukkah to leftists developing Kwanzaa as an alternative to the Judeo-Christian holidays to the seemingly endless lawsuits surrounding displays of the Ten Commandments, the Left never tires of making a reality of Jesus’ warning that the world would hate His followers.

These days, the Satanists have decided to take a different approach – if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. In Oklahoma, where the legislature has erected a Ten Commandments monument, a group of Satanists (based in New York, naturally) have expressed their desire to put up their own monument next to it.

It notified the state’s Capitol Preservation Commission that it wants to donate a monument and plans to submit one of several possible designs this month, said Lucien Greaves, a spokesman for the temple.

“We believe that all monuments should be in good taste and consistent with community standards,” Greaves wrote in letter to state officials. “Our proposed monument, as an homage to the historic/literary Satan, will certainly abide by these guidelines.”

Greaves said one potential design involves a pentagram, a satanic symbol, while another is meant to be an interactive display for children. He said he expects the monument, if approved by Oklahoma officials, would cost about $20,000.

I don’t see why Oklahoma officials wouldn’t approve an interactive display for children on the, um, values of Satanism, would you? Greaves – whose name sounds like a Satanist’s name if anyone’s does – believes that the monument would help spread the word about the Prince of Darkness.

You don’t walk around and see too many satanic temples around, but when you open the door to public spaces for us, that’s when you’re going to see us.

As expected, the Oklahoma ACLU has jumped into the fray. Its director, Brady Henderson, weighed in:

…if the Ten Commandments, with its overtly Christian message, is allowed to stay at the Capitol, the Satanic Temple’s proposed monument cannot be rejected because of its different religious viewpoint.

What values would the monument promote? What would the slogan be: “The Devil Made Me Do It”? What do you think? Is the controversy all a bunch of nothing, or do the Satanists have a beef? Feel free to share your opinions in the comments below. All I know is that some stories are too bizarre not to be made up. This is one of them.

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Which State Is The Most %@$* Foul-Mouthed?

Friday, December 6th, 2013 - by Chris Queen

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A six-month-old study of consumer phone calls has gone viral, and it reveals some fascinating things about which states’ residents use the most profanity and which are the most courteous.

Ohio ranked first among states where people were most likely to curse, swearing in one out of about every 150 phone conversations. Maryland came in second, followed by New Jersey, Louisiana and Illinois.

The state less likely to drop the f-bomb or some other curse word? Washington. People there cursed once in about every 300 conversations — or half as much as Ohioans. Massachusetts, Arizona, Texas and Virginia rounded out the top five of what Marchex dubbed the “goody two-shoes” category.

The company also aggregated data on the states most likely to say “please” and “thank you.” South Carolina came in first, followed by North Carolina, Maryland, Louisiana and Georgia. The least courteous states were Wisconsin, Massachusetts, Indiana, Tennessee and Ohio.

Mobile and technology company Marchex examined 600,000 consumer phone calls over a year, and their findings revealed even more specifics about profanity in phone conversations:

The data also found that:

  • 66% of curses come from men

  • The calls that contain the most cursing are more than 10 minutes long. So the longer someone is on the phone, the more likely that call is to devolve.

  • Calls in the morning are twice as likely to produce cursing as calls in the afternoon or evening.

So, I guess the lesson here is, if you see a number with an Ohio area code on your caller ID in the morning, brace yourself…

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The NSA Collected Porn Data on ‘Radicalizers’ to Discredit Them

Saturday, November 30th, 2013 - by Bryan Preston

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Ed Snowden has leaked another trove of documents, and the Huffington Post is generating clicks with it. The upshot is that the NSA monitored the online activities of six people it characterizes as Islamist radicalizers. The NSA built up information on these Islamists’ porn habits, for the purpose of discrediting them.

WASHINGTON — The National Security Agency has been gathering records of online sexual activity and evidence of visits to pornographic websites as part of a proposed plan to harm the reputations of those whom the agency believes are radicalizing others through incendiary speeches, according to a top-secret NSA document. The document, provided by NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden, identifies six targets, all Muslims, as “exemplars” of how “personal vulnerabilities” can be learned through electronic surveillance, and then exploited to undermine a target’s credibility, reputation and authority.

The NSA document, dated Oct. 3, 2012, repeatedly refers to the power of charges of hypocrisy to undermine such a messenger. “A previous SIGINT” — or signals intelligence, the interception of communications — “assessment report on radicalization indicated that radicalizers appear to be particularly vulnerable in the area of authority when their private and public behaviors are not consistent,” the document argues.

None of this is especially new. The allies built up extensive profiles and dossiers on Hitler’s private and even sexual life during World War II, and I’m sure the axis did the same to allied leaders. The Soviets probably had great fun building up files on J. Edgar Hoover and JFK, among others. They didn’t really have to build up a file on Ted Kennedy. Once he left a woman to drown, there wasn’t much they could expose that would have cost him his Massachusetts Senate seat. Maybe they could have run an op outing him as a closet Republican or something, but he was much more useful to them as a senator.

An attached appendix lists the “argument” each surveillance target has made that the NSA says constitutes radicalism, as well the personal “vulnerabilities” the agency believes would leave the targets “open to credibility challenges” if exposed.

One target’s offending argument is that “Non-Muslims are a threat to Islam,” and a vulnerability listed against him is “online promiscuity.” Another target, a foreign citizen the NSA describes as a “respected academic,” holds the offending view that “offensive jihad is justified,” and his vulnerabilities are listed as “online promiscuity” and “publishes articles without checking facts.” A third targeted radical is described as a “well-known media celebrity” based in the Middle East who argues that “the U.S perpetrated the 9/11 attack.” Under vulnerabilities, he is said to lead “a glamorous lifestyle.” A fourth target, who argues that “the U.S. brought the 9/11 attacks on itself” is said to be vulnerable to accusations of “deceitful use of funds.” The document expresses the hope that revealing damaging information about the individuals could undermine their perceived “devotion to the jihadist cause.”

The tactic of building up personal information on foreign enemies probably dates back, I don’t know, thousands of years. As long as humans have waged organized warfare. Sun Tzu would surely approve, and said as much when he wrote “Know your enemy.” We remain at war and we pay the NSA to conduct SIGINT on people who wish to harm Americans. That’s it’s job.

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How Low Can the Nobel Peace Prize Go?

Friday, October 4th, 2013 - by Sarah Hoyt
Nominated for Nobel Peace Prize.

Nominated for Nobel Peace Prize.

And in other news, the Nobel Peace Prize still lacks all credibility. According to the Washington Times:

Russian President Vladimir Putin was nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize by an advocacy group that credits him with bringing about a peaceful resolution to the Syrian-U.S. dispute over chemical weapons.

The Russian advocacy group International Academy of Spiritual Unity and Cooperation of Peoples of the World nominated Mr. Putin, characterizing his forged agreement with Syrian President Bashar Assad — to turn over admitted chemical weapons cache to international authorities — a world-class and prize-worthy piece of diplomacy, United Press International reported.

The group also took a dig at the United States.

While announcing the nomination during a press conference in Moscow, group officials said Mr. Putin deserved the Peace Prize much more than President Obama, who won the recognition in 2009.

Um… that group name sounds a lot like a survival from USSR Communist times. They were big on unity and the cooperation of peoples — on paper — while they positioned the boot just right to crush the unwary’s windpipe. But to give the devil his due, you cannot deny that Putin deserves the Nobel Peace Prize more than Obama did.

Putin might be a tyrant, a dictator, and responsible for the oppression of innocents in his own land and abroad, but he does do more than look good and say he’s not Bush.  Which is all Obama did to win the Nobel Peace Prize.

We live in very funny times, for anyone with an appreciation of black humor.

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This Fish is A Danger to Your Manhood

Thursday, August 15th, 2013 - by Sarah Hoyt
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This is a close relative of the invasive species that might very well be lurking in that lake you’re about to skinny dip in.

Swedish men have been told to keep their swimming trunks on while swimming in the sound off the country’s Southern Coast. The problem is an invasive species of fish commonly found in the Amazon.

The Telegraph reports:

The alert came after a fisherman in the Oresund Sound last week retrieved a 21 centimetre pacu – a relative of the piranha that is most commonly found in the Amazon region.

“Keep your swimwear on if you’re bathing in the Sound these days – maybe there are more out there!” cautioned the National History Museum in neighbouring Denmark.

The freshwater fish, which can grow up to 90 centimetres and weigh up to 25 kilogrammes, has been nicknamed the “ball cutter” for its attacks on the male genitalia.

In areas where pacus proliferate, fishermen have reportedly bled to death after losing their testicles to the fish’s crushing jaws.

But surely, you say, that doesn’t mean anything to men in the US? Well, the Telegraph further reports that:

Discoveries have also been reported in several US states; in 2006, officials at one Texas lake reportedly put a $100 bounty on the pacu caught there.

So, Gentlemen, if you should go swimming this weekend, I urge you to keep your swim trunks on.  Sometimes, modesty is the best part of valor.

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photo @ simongaberscik Shutterstock.com

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Drink Your Chocolate! It’s Good For You!

Tuesday, August 13th, 2013 - by Sarah Hoyt
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My doctor told me no less than two cups of hot cocoa a day! I swear!

Ladies and gentlemen, the news we’ve all been waiting for have arrived. According to a new study published in the American Academy of Neurology, chocolate, or at least hot chocolate is good for you.

The study had sixty people with an average age of 73 and no signs of dementia drink two cups of cocoa a day and measured changes in the blood flow to their brains.

Their findings: Eighteen of the 60 test subjects who had impaired blood flow to their brains at the beginning of the study experienced an 8.3 percent improvement by test’s end. Those with normal blood flow at the outset of the experiment did not see any improved blood flow. 

Yes, I know there have been problems with some of these studies in the past, and the methodology isn’t always right, but come on!  With people living longer and longer, dementia has become the specter that haunts us all and that – if we live long enough – will come for almost every one of us.

My grandmother used to say “May G-d give me my wits to the hour of my death.”

If hot cocoa improves my chances of that prayer coming true, I know what I’ll be doing.  Of course, due to the low-carb lifestyle, I’m restricted to no sugar cocoa, but I don’t let that stop me!

I know that a cup of cocoa once a week or so keeps my mood up, but now I’ll have to increase the intake to keep my memory up.

Two cups of cocoa a day.  It’s medicinal!

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image courtesy shutterstock / Alliance

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Abandoned Children as Game Show Prizes In Pakistan!

Monday, August 12th, 2013 - by Sarah Hoyt

 A Real, Live Baby!

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A good definition of evil is where we forget humans are humans and treat them as things. And if that’s the case, there’s a new Pakistani game show that is as evil as can be: A game show host in Pakistan has defended his decision to give away abandoned babies to childless couples live on TV.

No, I am not joking, nor would I be about something like this. And while I know that CNN – layers and layers of fact checkers – is not a good authority, CNN reported it.

Apparently abandoned children are being picked up by an organization and turned over to this show to give away to childless parents. The talk show host defends his actions this way:

Aamir Liaquat Hussain, who has handed out two baby girls so far, denied the giveaways were a publicity stunt.

He claimed the babies would have been ”eaten by cats or dogs” had they not been discovered by the show.

Is he claiming this is what normally happens when babies are not picked up by this organization? Or when they’re not turned in to his show as a giveaway?  Is he claiming this is the only way for a society to deal with its unwanted babies?

I don’t know. Maybe these children will be loved and cherished as they deserve to be. But starting out by being treated as things and handed out as a prize doesn’t seem the way to start that relationship with their adoptive parents.

Terry Pratchett, notably in I Shall Wear Midnight says evil starts with treating people as things.  I’m not sure as a universal rule, but certainly treating people as things is a bad way of looking at them. Because people – children or not – aren’t things. They have quirks, and ideas of their own, and wants, and there will be difficult times ahead for these families.

We all know about lottery winners and easy comes easy goes when it comes to prizes – but what about when the prize is a baby?

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image  courtesy shutterstock / Lorelyn Medina

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