2) Improving your self-esteem.
There are few things more frustrating than talking to a beautiful, intelligent, charming woman who believes she’s worthless. Explaining how ridiculous that is generally doesn’t work because when you tell someone who thinks she’s a loser that she’s actually an amazing person, she thinks you’re trying to make her feel better, take advantage of her, or that there must be something wrong with you, too. There are a variety of causes for low self-esteem, but you’ll almost always find it reinforced by the language the person uses. “I’m a loser,” “I’m a b*tch,” “Why am I so stupid?” “Why can’t I do anything right,” etc., etc., etc. It’s terrible to hear another human being talking about herself in a way that would make you want to punch someone else in the mouth if that person said it about her.
This is why it’s so important not to put yourself down. You’re not a “b*tch”; you may have been “a little b*tchy.” You’re not stupid; you just said something “a little dumb.” You’re not a failure; you just made “a mistake. It happens to everyone sometimes.” Even if you don’t believe it, change your language for a long enough period of time and your thinking will naturally, gradually start to change along with it.