5 Ways to Ruin a Commencement Speech
4. Speak about yourself for more than three minutes
A commencement speaker should refer to himself or herself only for as long as is needed to establish credibility. Brief anecdotes that illustrate the key message are also tolerable. When introduction morphs into autobiographical dissertation, students respond with the merited verdict; they yawn, then they text.
The distinguished speaker invited to address this year’s seniors could hardly be accused of lacking a captivating story. Humanitarian physician, he helped build one of the largest hospitals in Haiti. The audience greeted him with initial enthusiasm but lapsed into palpable frustration when, instead of converting his adventures into useful advice, he meandered through detailed intricacies of battles with local and global healthcare bureaucracy. Even in the last three minutes of the speech, when he finally reached out to a now mentally disengaged student body, the doctor managed to include the name of the organization he founded, Partners in Health, in the “take-home message”:
All your successes in life depend on partnership.
One student summed up the speech as “a humble brag.” The graduating class felt used for what was perceived in final analysis as a sales pitch.
One who should be absolved from this sin is Stephen Colbert. He referred to himself more times than could be counted in his Northwestern commencement speech but in the service of two great causes: making the students laugh, thus easing their agony; and driving home a truly profound message about their need to serve what they love if they are to be successful.
Great post. I think that this is great advice for politicians too! I’m sure none of these graduates have “saving the world” in mind- that’s Obama’s job. Good luck graduates! You’re about to find out that most of your college profs were full of crap and that you paid them way too much to qualify you for a job at Starbucks.
The lead picture reflects the sick state of today’s youth. We knew better than to fall asleep or yawn in front of parents and faculty. I’m 39 and my class was given strict instructions that were obeyed. These graduates were educated by porn and “Family Guy” diarrhea humor. It’s obvious they’ve had every advantage but today may not find jobs. It seems fitting – wishing them success is difficult. Anyone who has dealt with them understands.
Oh, if only award recipients would heed this advice in their acceptance speeches as well.
The author’s bio states that she writes on the growth of antisemitism and misogyny in conservative organizations.
Isn’t this French for makes stuff up?
I think Bill Gates and the late Steve Jobs are/were certainly qualified to speak about changing the world. But they are/were the exception. No one else with the proper credentials comes to mind…
I read up to the point where you stated that you need to serve what you LOVE in order to be successful. Talk about a cliche. The world is full of people doing what they HAVE to do, not what they love. In fact, if you wait around long enough (as many do) to suddenly fall in love with doing anything before anything actually gets done, you’ll be sitting around for a long time. What is the estimate about how many people actually love what they do? TEN PERCENT? Think people who cashier, drive buses, clean office buildings, and on and on are in LOVE with what they do? Thank God they are grown up enough to GET A JOB. And take care of themselves. Instead of waiting around to fall in love with their work. You can add that overused tripe to the list too.
I was there when Obama gave his commencement address to the University of Michigan two years ago. My reaction: “Great speech, too bad none of it’s true.”
The commencement speaker at my graduation was Joe Biden. I don’t think he made any gaffes, although I had been up quite late the night before, so I’m not really sure. Do graduates really listen to the commencement speaker? I think he(Biden) had his own hair then, although I’m not sure about that either.
The commencement speaker at my graduation will remain nameless as will the university, the timeline was early 1950s.
It was less than we had expected as two years later the keynoter was arrested, indicted and convicted of ‘Influence peddling’, that was the euphemism for soliciting bribes.
And that was just the beginning. Over a five year period, four commencement speakers suffered similar fates, albeit for widely assorted infractions It came to the point where no one would even consider accepting the honor.
At least it served one good result, the selection committee became much more selective!
The Tucker May speech was classic – a good four minute listen. Only time will tell if a decade or two from now if it will be ridiculous to be asking “Who is Tucker May?”