Tom Cruise Is 20 Years Too Old for Rock of Ages
Not rock-naughty, though; since the movie is locked into a kid-friendly PG-13 rating, there’s little of the debauchery associated with actual rockers. Cruise and Ackerman, panting with lust for each other, do what’s meant to be a steamy duet, but after he takes off his shirt and she strips down to her undies, they just stop and go their separate ways. Like most of Rock of Ages, it comes across as fake, tame and pre-processed for mass consumption. Not that a movie that thinks REO Speedwagon and “We Built This City” qualify as rock has the slightest idea what rock is really about.
Nor does Cruise, who is 20 years too old for this part (when was the last time you saw club-going kids get excited about a 50-year-old rocker?) and seems like more of a control freak than a wild man. The rabbit-fur coat and the cowboy hat can’t conceal the fact that Cruise takes himself way too seriously and approaches this part as hard work requiring intense concentration rather than a lark.
At one point Baldwin squeals, in the campy tone that fills every scene in this wretchedly misguided movie, “Taxes — they’re so un-rock-and-roll!” Yes, and here’s something else that’s un-rock-and-roll: show tunes. Guns ‘n’ Roses was never meant to sound like Guys and Dolls.
Tom Cruise is not too old. This would have been a better movie at 10% of the cost if instead of middle-aged actors they had enlisted middle-aged rockers.
Mr. Boot,
Stick ONLY to, ‘This is Spinal Tap’ to get your fix on rock star pomposity.
Didn’t you learn your lesson with, ‘Rock Star’? Heck Rock Star is very loosely based on Judas Priest’s Rob Halford. Thoug Halford doing hair metal shtick.. I don’t think so. Even Priest’s sellout, commercial stuff is REAL rock as compared to 99+% of the crapola being pimped as ‘rock’ ~ ’86-’91.
As for Cruise being miscast, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet.
Cruise is cast as writer Lee Child’s, ‘Jack Reacher’ in the upcoming movie with the same title.
Though Reacher’s depicted as an ugly, 6’4″ ape-of-a-man, post-Cold War Army Investigator who lives off the grid.
Yeah, 5’6″ in-lifts Cruise is so inappropriate for this character, flick it ain’t funny.
Supposedly Lee Child is pro-Cruise for the part. A shame, really.
Then again Lee Child’s last few books have fallen into the boring and PC realms so this inevitable death kneel of a movie is apparently just desserts.
BTW, what are Dr. John, Neil Diamond doing being considered, ‘RnR HoF inductees’? And yet Judas Priest is snubbed? Sickening.
Neil Diamond and Dr John have more musical talent in their little toes than Judas Priest.
” . . . more musical talent in their little toes . . . ”
That’s the problem — their talent is all in their toes.
ash, I’d never spoken of Diamond’s or Doc John’s ‘talents’ for that’s ALWAYS in the eye of the beholder.
MY comment was directed as to WHY would the 2 aforementioned be even considered for the RnR HoF?
There is NO RnR component to their music whatsoever.
Neil Diamond is 70′s AM dial-type music and Doc John’s music is primarily disco with a smidgen of light-funk.
And ‘RickGreenvilleSC’ – I echo your sentiment regarding RUSH being continually snubbed. Though the RnR HoF is as ‘relevant’, anchored to ‘reality’ as the Nobel Committee..
I will do you one better- why Dr. John and Neil Diamond and why not RUSH?
Goin on a hunger strike until the proggers are let in
Maybe I don’t know enough about the “plot” but isn’t Cruise _supposed_ to be playing an aging performer past his prime who won’t give it up, a la Bette Davis in “all about eve”?
Big deal.
No one who actually knows and likes rock’n'roll, would go anywhere near this thing. They would have avoided most of these songs in their original form and would prefer dentistry minus novocaine than seeing the Glee versions. Celebrity karaoke?
Cruise as Reacher?
Say Goodnight, Lee.
Don’t I know it!
Very disappointing to say the least.
Have you read the last couple of books, Otto? They’ve been mediocre at best for me.
Though a nearing-50 years ‘young’ Jack Reacher does indeed need to slow down sometime!
Meh. Get Crazy http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085551/ was fine. Don’t need to see it again (though it would be great if it came out on DVD.)
I will always be in love with Simon LeBon of Duran Duran, no matter the age.
The movie poster is bad enough. They all look like cheap charicatures of the people they are supposed to be. Besides, I already change the station if something awful like Poison or Def Lepperd comes on. Why would I pay to see Tom Cruise sing the same crappy songs? I mean, I’m sure he put some hard work into it, but still…
Was taken to the stage show here in L.A. by some friends. Not usually interested in stage shows. It was actually exceptional. There was an abundance of serious talent on the stage. Great voices, good acting, good characters. The female who played the young girl coming to L.A. was a small girl with a fantastic big voice. The band that played in the background for all songs was one of the best I have heard. At the end there was a solo by the lead guitar player – amazing.
The story was clear and the direction was good. I was surprised that a movie was made of this as I could not see how it would work as a movie. It works as a stage show but not transferable to film and if you saw it you would agree.
KR
How old is Mick? How old is Macca? Steve Tyler? Sorry. Cruise may be wrongly cast, but he is not too old?
Of course Cruise is too old for this role. For that matter, so are Mick, Macca, and Tyler.* For an 80′s rock homage set in the 80′s, you need someone who actually looks 25-30, not someone who was that age when the music was being made. If this were a movie set NOW about those times, then sure, he’d probably be a fine choice.
Cruise is certainly a youthful-looking 50, but it’s not the same thing. This seems a lot like he wanted the role because he loved that music, and this is his chance.
*Even Steve Tyler wasn’t this old when Aerosmith had their “Walk This Way,” Run-DMC-inspired career reboot.
Mick Jagger, Keith Richards or Steve Tyler he’s not.
This may turn into a cult movie, such as “Rocky Horror Picture Show.” Still, it would be better if screenwriters could come up with original music for projects like this.
Does he appear to be and act like he’s too old in this role? Isn’t that all that matters? He’s an actor and he’s acting. If he can pull it off, then his age doesn’t matter. If, OTOTH, his age is obvious and distracting, then you are correct, he’s too old. So which is it?
And the reason any sensible person would care is…. what?
I thought this was a joke when I first heard about it.
I suspect this will be like the Oliver Stone version of “The Doors”. If you’re high enough, or drunk enough, it might be fun. Otherwise, in another decade or so, that era’s version of “Mystery Science Theater” or Elvira will be snickering over “Rock of Ages”.
Foreigner? Journey? What, Milli Vanilli and Abba weren’t available?
As one who lived in this era and performed in it (albeit in San Francisco rather than Hollywood) I can speak to the fact that a lot of us young club going kids were ecstatic when Iggy Pop came to town to perform in the clubs.
Now, I have not seen Rock of Ages, either the Broadway show or the movie, so it’s entirely possible I’m missing the goal or the point. I just wanted to say that those of us who performed in the hair band scene, while we tended to like and appreciate the young up and coming talent, and regularly competed for the opportunity to play with the recent national bands who toured clubs prior to breaking into the mainstream and playing arenas (Poison, Warrant, Black n Blue, Little Caesar, Vain, Dangerous Toys, and Bang Tango being some notable examples) we also had room in our hearts and an interest in seeing some good old fashioned legends when they came to town (Iggy Pop, Motorhead, etc.).
Age wasn’t the factor, atitude was. If you had the attitude and could deliver it on-stage, we didn’t care how old you were
.
REO not rock? Pu-lease.
I’m 46 and have had 20 somethings hit on me before during and after gigs.
So there!