Vitamin Water Needs to Use Porn to Get People Excited to Drink It
I took this photo this morning while out walking Maura:
Last month a pastor in New York City objected to the same billboard in his neighborhood and managed to get it removed:
This offended the eye of pastor Freddy Wyatt, whose Gallery Church operates out of a loft across the street. “I was angered and brokenhearted,” sayeth Wyatt in the New York Post. “This ad takes something that’s pure and precious and just strips it of its value.” Pure?! Ever tried Vitaminwater, Reverend? It’s unholy water. Kidding, of course. He means the nearly naked model. Wyatt appealed to a higher authority, by which I mean he tweeted at the advertiser, asking that the billboard be cast out of the neighborhood. And lo, on April 3—Good Friday, no less—his wishes came to pass. “This is a respectable, honorable, and classy decision on the part of Vitaminwater,” Wyatt says. “Here’s four tweets from a random pastor, and without even a conversation, they took it down.” The advertiser beheld the publicity stemming from its decision, and saw that it was good. Say amen, somebody!
I filed a lawsuit demanding they put it in my living room.
LOL! Good one.
Sugar water. God, that stuff is vile.
Anyone who would buy a “health” drink from the Coca-Cola Company is beyond gullible.
I’ve been to many food-industry conventions. Mostly, the booths are staffed by guys in business suits, or people in chef costumes, or quaint old ladies, or just random employees. But whenever one walks down the aisle and comes to the booth of a “vitamin water” company (of which there are several), their booth is invariably staffed by about two dozen young runway models in matching skimpy outfits, with techno music playing, while the girls accost every passerby and ply them with samples.
They get a lot of “attention,” as you might imagine, but everyone knows the water itself is completely vile and undrinkable — the garbage cans at the surrounding booths are always overflowing with spat-out samples and abandoned bottles.
In other words, I’ve known for quite some time that “vitamin water” is and always has been a hoax: it’s just an excuse to peddle sex and porn. Buying the water is just the “price of admission” to view the sexiness — just like a “two drink minimum” in a strip club. Everyone know the strip-club drinks are watered-down swill, but don’t mind overpaying for them if the result is you get to see girls.
you have to do *something* to get people to pay you a couple of bucks for three cents worth of product in a five cent bottle.
of course the main utility of any of these drinks is convenience, that it happens to be there in a cold vending machine when you want it, all the rest is a struggle for it to be your choice when you feel like wasting two bucks.
Really? Can’t anything be sold on it merits? How low can we go and for what? A bottle of water? Give me a break!
>>>>Can’t anything be sold on its merit?
That girl has quite a lot of merit, I’d say…
Next time get a girl who actually has some boobs to sow… Hard to tell which one is the surfboard…
LOL!
My God, you mean someone is using pictures of pretty girls to sell things? Outrageous!
This is, by the way, a miserable excuse for porn. Write me, I can give you some recommendations.
I’m shocked, SHOCKED! And I want a life-size poster of this ad to study closely to make sure I am as shocked as I think I should be.