6. Highly Collapsible Water Bottle
The bottled water industry is feeling the heat from the Green Movement. A nutty documentary called Tapped argues that bottled water is unsafe and environmentally insensitive. Congress even held hearings on bottled water at the behest of the Green Movement. The bottled water companies think they can buy peace by going green. Think again.
Companies like Deer Park have come out with a flimsy, pansy Eco bottle that crushes in your hand like the Hulk would smash a VW Beetle. The “Green Eco-Shape” bottle by Deer Park, boasts it is the “lightest half-liter bottle” on the market. It’s also the most annoying because it spills all over when you open it. It also collapses when you drink from it. Like so many in industry, Deer Park believes that the Green Movement will leave them alone if they make small capitulations. It won’t happen. The Green Movement will continue to demand and devour until bottled water companies vanish from the landscape. That’s what the Green Movement is all about – eliminating consumer products which do not comport with their theology of scarcity and simplicity.
7. Quiet High-Efficiency Dishwashers
The reason new high-efficiency dishwashers are so quiet is that they don’t clean dishes. Like the ineffective front-loading clothes washer, saving energy and water is more important to the Green Movement than clean dishes. Try opening one of these quiet dishwashers mid-cycle and take a peek at what is going on. Compare it to your old dishwashers. New high efficiency washers use less water, gently and quietly squirted, over the course of sometimes six quiet hours. Open up your old dishwasher and it was aqua-violence. Blasts of hot, steaming water, noise, and energy-devouring mayhem got dishes clean. The new quiet energy efficient dishwashers, like the new water-efficient toilets, sometimes require a second cycle.
The Green Movement deserves most of the blame for bringing us these products that make life worse. But so do the Republicans and captains of industry who think capitulation to the environmental Left buys them peace. Fred Upton hasn’t earned their friendship because he brought us compact fluorescent bulbs. The anti-bottled water movement still has Deer Park in their cross-hairs, despite their awful eco-bottle. The Green Movement knows no compromise, until such time as toilets are not only smaller, but also lack water, or even go away. Theirs is a substitute theology, intolerant and primitive.
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