ASHE SCHOW: Ever had drunk sex? That’s rape, according to this university.

Have you ever had sex after consuming alcohol (any amount)? If so, then you’re a rapist – or rape victim, depending on your sex.

Coastal Carolina University, in South Carolina, is continuing its apparent quest to become the biggest panderer to the extreme wing of the campus sexual assault crusaders with a new poster claiming that only sober people can consent to sex.

Nearly a decade ago, the same university hung up posters around campus claiming that women could not consent if they had been drinking, heavily implying that men could. That poster was discovered after an old coworker of mine sent me a photo of it on Twitter.

The poster claims that while Jake and Josie were both drunk, only Josie was unable to consent, making Jake an automatic rapist. “A woman who is intoxicated cannot give her legal consent for sex, so proceeding under these circumstances is a crime,” the poster read.

Forget the fact that an “intoxicated” man should also be unable to consent, this poster implies that women are weak, unable to handle themselves when drinking and therefore need additional protections. By this same logic, a woman who is caught driving while drunk should be innocent because hey, she’s a woman, she shouldn’t be responsible for the things she does after drinking alcohol.

Women are obviously too weak for college. They should be kept at home under parental supervision, until they’re old enough to be married off and placed under a husband’s control.