DESPERATION: Europe says US-made cheeses can’t use Old World names.

Errico Auricchio produced cheese with his family in Italy until he brought his trade to the United States more than 30 years ago. Now, the European Union is saying his cheese isn’t authentic enough to carry a European name.

As part of trade talks, the EU wants to ban the use of names like Parmesan, feta and Gorgonzola on cheese made in the United States. The argument is that the American-made cheeses are shadows of the original European varieties and cut into sales and identity of the European cheeses.

Meh. The real problem is the opposite: Like American beer-making, American cheesemaking has advanced to the point where it’s often superior to the European product. Blessed be the cheesemakers!