“Give me a bag of treats and a week and I’ll make your dog forget you ever walked the earth.”

This has already been disproved to my satisfaction several times over. For example, when my daughter and her family spent two weeks in Florida, I kept their dog. She’s a sweet-natured, funny, playful boxer, and I spoiled her outrageously. Yet sometimes she would stand on the back deck and whine for no apparent reason (I maintain she was missing her family, prove me wrong). When they came to pick her up, she practically tied herself in knots she was so overjoyed.

Obviously Mr. Zorn and his like have never lived with dogs.