37. Never married. Here’s how the conversation goes:
Married Female: “Don’t you want to get married?”
Jack: “What’s in it for me?”
MF: “Well, don’t you want to have kids?”
Jack: “No.”
MF: “Well, do you want to remain alone?”
Jack: “I’m never alone. I have a dozen girls in my phone I could call right now. I have dinner with buddies at least three times per week.”
MF: “Yeah, but … girls in your phone . . . that’s not a real relationship.”
Jack: “Okay, back to my original question: What’s in a ‘real relationship’ that I don’t already have?”
MF: “Emotional support. Financial support.”
Jack: “I don’t need either of those.”
MF: “What about your duty?”
Jack: “My duty?”
MF: “Yeah, your duty as a man to marry a woman and raise children. There are lots of good women and children out there that need a husband and father.”
Jack: “And what about my happiness?”
MF: “It’s not about you! Duty comes first.”
Jack: “So I should get married and have a family even if I don’t want to and don’t enjoy it?”
MF: “Yes, I think you should.”
Jack: “Um… I think I’m going to stick with happiness over this ‘duty’ you describe.”
MF: “Okay, so what about love? Don’t you want to be in love?”
Jack: “To love me requires a respect and understanding that I like my freedom, so anyone who truly loves me and understands me would not want to marry me.”
MF: “So that’s it? You’re just going to live the bachelor life forever?”
Jack: “Probably.”
MF: “You’re such a pig!”
