Wow. I don’t even know how to keep this brief. I’ll do my best though. In relation to the 144 women in college per 100 men statistic, the statement is made, “who are these women gonna marry”. As a 29 year old single guy I can attest to the fact that women my age really have no interest in marriage. In many cases women have been taught for generations that marriage=reliance on a man and the institution has been vilified by the feminist movement as a usurpation of a woman’s individuality and power. Marriage to many, many women is a man’s way to “keep a sister down”. I’ve got a quality education, a great job, financial stability, I’m a home owner, I’ve never been married/divorced and have no children, I stay healthy, I’m the optimum weight for my height, and come from a supportive, grounded family. You’d think these qualities would make me an attractive partner in a relationship. Not so much, and from the women I’ve been around (friends, coworkers, bar crowds, etc.) it’s mostly because I have nothing to offer that she can’t do on her own. The overwhelming attitude is, “what do I need a man for?” (and no, love/companionship is not a valid answer these days). I’ll temper this however by saying, more power to them. I would like to get married and have a family so these attitudes make it more difficult for me to pursue that goal, but so be it. Everyone (male or female) is entitled to live their lives how they see fit and if they don’t have the same goal of marriage and a family, I’m not gonna sit around resenting it, I’ll just keep waiting until I meet someone with whom I can share these goals.
There was another comment made that seemed to elude to the fact that because of the flood of women vs. men graduating college there’s an educational and occupational gap between men and women and perhaps men are “intimidated” or unwilling to date a woman who is better educated or earns a higher salary. With respect, that’s a steaming load of crap. If you’re the type of guy that feels like less of a man because your girl (your girl? oooh he made a comment implying that the woman is his “property”) makes more than you then you’ve got deeper issues then dating. I personally have no problem with a woman having a higher level of education then me or bringing in a higher salary. I’ve actually seen the issue in the reverse. Women with a masters feel they are “above” dating a guy that only has a BS, or if she’s making 50-75k she won’t date someone who’s not making 75-100k (which inherently strikes me as odd. Wasn’t the point of equal rights that women wanted to be equal or above men in professional/educational terms but now that the opportunities are similar, women are still only willing to relate to men that are above them in these regards. But I digress…). There’s a sense of entitlement that really is unbelievable. Again, I speak in generalities. I’m not saying all well educated women are like this but many are.
As I said in the beginning, I could go on a long time and I realize I’m only going to end up sounding like I hate/resent women and I don’t. Perhaps I’ve already garnered the label “misogynist” from some readers but the fact is I have given up to a certain degree, which is to say it’ll take a lot before I’m willing to try and enjoy a mutually beneficial romantic relationship with a woman in my generation. It’s been made abundantly clear that I’m little more than a sperm donor, the fact that I’m financially sound makes no difference because she can take care of herself just fine, and to be married is to submit to a man which just ain’t gonna happen.
Oh and by the way, a big part of the reason you don’t hear men talking about what’s going on is very simply that we’re men. Another comment that was made implied that we’re keeping our mouths shut out of some misplaced idea that “men are supposed to just keep their head down and drive through it”. That’s a bit patronizing. The feminist movement as far as I can tell garnered most of its attention and progress through the sheer ability to b*tch and moan. There were definitely inequalities and I’m not arguing that action to level those out was a good thing for society but the method was detestable. Men simply aren’t going to go that route. We’ll deal with it, work through it and persevere because that’s what men do. They don’t complain about how “unfair” things are. In my case, I don’t walk around whining about “women don’t like me”, or “women don’t find any value in me”, blah blah blah. I simply continue being the best guy I know how to be and someday, maybe I’ll meet someone with whom I can enjoy the kind of companionship I’d like to enjoy. If not, “them’s the breaks” as they say. Either way complaining or “making a stand” just isn’t going to have the effect I’d like to see anyway so why do it? Usually the only effect that screaming about being p*ssed off has is that more people know you’re p*ssed off. In this case I find it unfortunate that men are held with the regard they are, but more people knowing that its unfortunate really isn’t going to solve the problem is it. More likely people will simply say “men have every luxury they could want, what right do they have to talk about ‘life is hard/unfair/whatever’”
