Ask Dr. Helen: Do Husbands Owe Wives Post-Childbirth ‘Push Presents?’
I have to say, I find the coinage “push present” cute and clever, and above all innocuous. I certainly don’t get the furor it seems to have created. I guess some men feel affronted at the idea that they should be expected to give a gift on such an occasion, but I think that it should be natural to want to express your love and appreciation in such a way. And not everybody has to give a hideous piece of overpriced metal art like the dude in the NYT article – by all means, tailor it to your budget and inclination. As for asking for a present, it kind of spoils the effect, but I wasn’t above planting the idea in fertile soil. I say this as someone who considers herself fortunate beyond measure for such a prince of a husband and pearl of a daughter, but listen, when you’ve just undergone 9 months of nausea, dizziness, back pain, frequent urination at most inconvenient times, carpal tunnel, indigestion, and assorted other ailments (like gestational diabetes, in my case, necessitating the frequent drawing of blood and a sad farewell to chocolate), with more people poking and prodding your intimate parts than Paris Hilton, culminating in 17 agonizing hours of howling pain wherein you find yourself subjected to indignities too numerous to mention, not to mention literally ripped apart and stitched back up, and followed by cracked and bleeding nipples, sleepless nights, blocked ducts, engorged breasts the size and consistency of footballs, an inability to sit or walk comfortably for months or go to the bathroom without leaving behind a scene reminiscent of CSI: Miami, and a considerably depreciated body image not helped by the spit-up and poop stains dotting your clothes and person, plus all the hormonal havoc that comes with the territory – well, gentlemen, you too would be in need of a pick-me-up I think.
