Ask Dr. Helen: Do Husbands Owe Wives Post-Childbirth ‘Push Presents?’
Ohmigosh, how cynical everyone is all of a sudden. I don’t know about all you austere types out there, but I have no objection to presents. It’s all very nice to say the baby is its own reward, blah blah, but when you’re suffering from baby blues, are feeling flabby and exhausted and overwhelmed and vulnerable, not to mention miserably sore in unmentionable places, a little gift goes a long way. It’s no substitute for a strong and loving marriage and utter devotion to the baby, but my “push present” (a beautiful flower arrangement, nothing terribly extravagant – we did just have a baby, after all) elevated my mood considerably and made me feel – well, appreciated.
Let’s face facts: nature did not design men and women to bear anywhere near the same brunt of it when it comes to childbearing, and although being a stay-at-home wife and mom is the most rewarding and fulfilling experience I’ve ever had, it has certainly entailed more sacrifice on my part than on my husband’s. So a little something – and I don’t care how much it costs – to say thank you is a pretty nice tradition if you ask me.
