“Regarding this comment from tanstaafl above…
Despite all the progress in recent years, there’s still truth in this observation…A big problem for women is …the double bind that tells a girl she is equal, but inferior, that her parameter of self-esteem is the approval of others and not the cultivation of self.
…can you explain how I, who grew up in this culture, and presumably, drinks from the same water supply as millions of other women, managed to become a woman who can muster the sheer courage to say, “Hey, ya big lug, lemme talk!”? I had no friends as a child, and became kind of a doormat as a result (desperate to be liked). I fixed that in my 20’s, and now, what I care about is whether I’m being true to what I believe in…which sometimes requires telling some blowhard to put a sock in it so I can be heard.”
I like to deal in reality.
In quoting that passage (granted, it dates from the 70′s), I’m not talking about your personal journey or any single individual’s enlightenment or personal strength in seeing through the BS and stepping up to the plate. (is that enough clichés ?)
I’m talking about reality, a reality that persists for many women today.
And whether or not any particular woman or women “stand up to guff” doesn’t affect a reality still prevalent.
An example currently in the news might be the women in the Texas Latter Day Saints compound. Their particular bondage (long, modest dresses, sexual availability at puberty to creeps 50 years old) is not especially far removed from the view of the world radical Islamists would impose.
are men to blame?
Nobody should be blamed for lingering cultural attitudes and conditioning of (some) women.
Blame is beside the point.
Just keep doing what you’re doing.
(Advice R Us)
