I refer everyone to the wonderful book by George Gilder “Men and Marriage.” Social changes since the 1960s are dividing men into the relationship haves and have-nots. Boys growing up in mother- headed households and society feeding a constant diet of “what’s wrong with men” or defining normal behavior of boys as a disease that must be cured can leave a vast number of boys/men giving up on normal marriage.
I think these factors have exaggerated my normal shyness into a pattern of getting more and more comfortable being more and more alone. I can function well enough in social contexts but I have little desire to “put myself out there.” Now that I have a steady job, after growing up in divorce-related poverty and chaos, pets, and a house I have much dread about not making a perfect choice in a mate and having my life ruined and my house taken away or forced to pay someone else to live in my house.
I doubt I will marry and it’s not a very big deal to me except if I think about it at the wrong time or for long periods.
