“Note from a woman: We tend to like guys who are thoughtful and considerate. It’s the guys who show no initiative or backbone who call themselves “nice” because they haven’t committed any axe murders that we typically avoid.”
I think most men – when they speak of being “nice” – mean “has good intentions/is open to a more-than-physical relationship.”
So many of these problems, I believe, are the result of the stultifying effect of feminism on men – particularly the lie that men and women are the same. Thus, it is verboten to tell young men that very often, women don’t actually mean what they say, and a good rule of thumb is to watch what they do, after they say what they say, and learn. “I just want a nice guy*” is a loaded phrase, and I sometimes think that women feel obligated to say this in order that people don’t criticize their choice of a jerk on the basis that they should not then complain about his jerky behavior. Likewise with “I don’t want to play games.**”
Translations:
*I want a guy I find attractive to be nice to me, and to continue to feel attracted to him. (This may or may not be possible in practice.)
** I want to play the game and win, rather than lose.
