Anthropogenic Global Warming: The Greatest Fraud in History?
Public schooling. Public transportation. Public Housing. Public toilet. Public swimming pool. Oops, I just repeated myself. But what the nation needs now is publicly subsidized wind-farms to fight global warming! Step right up, folks, step right up. Don’t be shy. I have the cure for global warming. Buy a bottle, it’s only a dollar, of Dr. Al Gore’s secret formula. Cures everything from scabies to lumbago, removes stains from carpeting and upholstery, put it in your gas tank to increase mileage, and it’s only a buck.
Why confront a real problem like economic meltdown or Islamic terrorism when the big bucks are in a totally fabricated crisis? Get away from the curtain, boy, there’s nothing there you need to see. Al Gore is a marketing genius right down to his shiny Nobel Peace Prize. The dude needs to take it to Wall Street with an IPO. I’m in! Guilt for sale on this magnitude hasn’t been seen since Johann Tetzel. Sell the mythical to the gullible. Carbon credits don’t even require a wharehouse. Al Gore could teach Ron Popiel a thing or two. Why sell complete crap when you can make the same money selling nothing at all?
I look to Al Gore with deepest admiration. The man put his divinity school education to good use after all. Not too bad for a drop-out. I would gladly sew him robes in purple and gold for just a few shares of stock. Oh please, please, please, pretty please, Mr. Gore, I could sell my conscience too for a few million bucks. Every man has his price. I want a bishopric at least. Even split, 50-50, you and me for the American south-west. Yes, I will kiss your rings. Small price.
