Daddy Nobucks: When Involuntary Fathers Are Forced to Foot The Bill
I am SO sick of the excuses from BOTH parents. No one bothers to learn about their legal responsibilities before undertaking SEX, an activity which most people should know by now MAKES BABIES, babies which COST MONEY….they probably take more time shopping for a good cell phone contract than learning (BEFORE making a baby) about the laws of their states concerning child support and custody.
Women….1) Don’t sleep with losers and then expect an $8 per hour overworked county child support worker to be able to magically turn them into responsible upright citizens once you’ve left them. If he worked at McDonald’s when you were together, NO the court can’t make him go get a $20 hour job just because you want to be a stay at home mom now. 2) If he didn’t pay for the 6 kids he had before he was with you, he WON’T PAY FOR YOUR NEW ONES EITHER. 3) When the kids live with Dad, PAY YOUR SUPPORT….being a “mom” is not a “get out of child support free” pass!!! 4) And stop withholding the visitation every time a payment is a day late….you may think it’s a great way to get back at the jerk, but someday your kids WILL figure out what you’ve done. I hope you pay for it in spades.
Men….1) Don’t wait until you’ve been the kid’s dad for 15 years before you call and say “I’m not the Dad” – it’s TOO LATE. 2) If you already have 4 kids to 2 ex’s….DON’T go out and get a new wife and have more kids! If you couldn’t afford two cars, you’d never go out and buy a third….WHY are you bringing more kids into the world??? 3) And if mom doesn’t let you see the kids….TAKE HER TO COURT. When you just stop paying, you add fuel to her fire and you don’t exactly score points with the Judge. LEARN your RIGHTS and RESPONSIBILITIES. 4) GET and KEEP a freakin’ job. If those kids lived with you, you wouldn’t have the luxury of not paying for their food and housing….just because they live with mom shouldn’t change your responsbilities. 5) Learn about what happens when you don’t pay support, and take steps…LIKE PAYING…to ensure you don’t have to deal with child support enforcement.
To BOTH parents….NO, the situation is NOT GOOD. No, neither of you is going to be terribly happy with WHATEVER the court order is. NO, the court CANNOT “fix” him/her/the situation FOR you. Mom NEVER thinks she’s getting enough money, and Dad ALWAYS thinks he’s paying too much. Mom and Dad show off with new purchases, new boy/girlfriends, vacations, to show the ex how GREAT their life is without them, when all it does deep down is cause problems between you two, and harm your kids. GET OVER YOURSELVES, LIFE IS NOT FAIR and THERE ARE CONSEQUENCES TO YOUR ACTIONS. This is NOT ABOUT YOU, it’s about those KIDS. If you didn’t want to be in this situation, keep your pants zipped…it won’t KILL YOU to not have SEX. I am soooo tired of this excuse, like everyone is some kind of mindless automaton that is required to copulate with whoever is nearest when the mood strikes, or risk exploding. Next time you just *can’t* resist, and the idea of bringing some poor innocent kid into your messed up lives isn’t enough to stop you, think about the THOUSANDS of dollars it could cost you, YEARS of protracted court hearings, and having to deal for AT LEAST the next 18 YEARS with some person you obviously didn’t love or respect enough to maintain a relationship, whether romantic or just being able to treat each other like adults.
YOU both did this, and YOU need to accept that BAD DECISIONS have CONSEQUENCES, and it shouldn’t be the government’s job to make up for your POOR LIFE CHOICES.
(P.S. Yes, there are exceptions to what I wrote above, but if you’re flying to type some angry, screaming, poorly spelled post right now, you’re probably not one of them)
