When I was 15 years old I worked at a service station. My boss was a sociopath, a crook a liar, an adulterer, and a thief: but he was very likable. He also taught me something very wise. He said that if you want people to like you, don’t do things for them, get them to do things for you. No body, he said, wants to be around somebody they owe something to. Everyone is happy to see someone who owes them a favor. As evidence, he pointed out customers who bought gas across the street repeatedly after he had given them credit at our station. He said they wouldn’t be back to our station until they had paid their bill and didn’t feel beholden anymore. He was right. This was a long time ago, but I have never come across any evidence that proved him wrong on this point. You can be altruistic by letting people do things for you. It makes them feel better
