“The North Koreans have refused to withdraw the money in cash, insisting that it be transferred to an account in another bank so they can make withdrawals and deposits as they please.” Nicholas Kralev, “North Korea Cash May End Up in U.S. Bank”, The Washington Times, 5/10/07

The Kim Jong Il Behavioral Modification Program is cranking away in high gear at the State Department. It took less than 24 hours from the time of Kim’s latest demand, noted above, for the beleaguered Rice and Hill team to snap to sharpish and fulfill Dear Leader’s wish. Not bad, considering they had to prevail upon the Treasury Department (our only functioning department of government) to waive all necessary sanctions, somehow circumvent the Patriot Act (nobody has yet mentioned just how this was accomplished), and then find a U.S. bank (which refuses to be named!) to accept the transfer of Kim’s tainted $25 million from BDA in Macau, and any other funds Kim may wish to deposit and disperse in the future. It must have been 24 hours of not so quiet desperation at State (mmmm, wait a minute….. Note to Condi: contact Rupert @ Fox re: “State of Desperation” for next season fill. Russell Crowe and Halle Berry to star.). But all’s well that ends well, as another glorious day of good works and achievement goes into the State Department memory book. And let’s not forget Volume XXIII, “Fulfillment of Desires”, from Dear Leader’s collected smirks, in hardcover, a signed first edition, has already arrived from Amazon and now graces a shelf in Secretary Rice’s office as tangible proof of confidence building at work. The jelly jar of plutonium will be along shortly……it just needs a few more calls….. to Homeland Security, and then Customs, oh, and Department of Transportation, and the Fed Ex guy’s wife (he’s really fine, she shouldn’t worry about the environment suits she saw on the news), probably the Energy Department (do we still have one? well, El Baradei will do in a pinch….)…… And then for tomorrow, Dear Leader would like….. Join the State Department and fix the world!