Comments on: The Peter Pan Myth: The Real Reason Men Won’t Settle Down http://pjmedia.com/blog/the-peter-pan-myth-the-real-reason-men-wont-settle-down/ Thu, 16 Feb 2012 01:18:32 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Margo http://pjmedia.com/blog/the-peter-pan-myth-the-real-reason-men-wont-settle-down/#comment-1263710 Margo Fri, 16 Sep 2011 20:48:36 +0000 http://pajamasmedia.com/?p=39430#comment-1263710 One thing which seems to have evaded everyone is the fact that personal responsibility is missing now. There is no incentive to grow up. There are no consequences. It used to be that when you got out of school at whatever level, you had to get a job or go hungry and be homeless. Parents did not let their kids live with them more than a couple years without paying their share after they got out of school, if that. There were no government programs that paid for everything - if there were, it was shameful to have to avial yourself of them. Now, if kids don't get a job, they either live with and mooch off their parents forever, or the government pays their way. So, where is the incentive? Where are the consequences for irresponsibility? One thing which seems to have evaded everyone is the fact that personal responsibility is missing now. There is no incentive to grow up. There are no consequences. It used to be that when you got out of school at whatever level, you had to get a job or go hungry and be homeless. Parents did not let their kids live with them more than a couple years without paying their share after they got out of school, if that. There were no government programs that paid for everything – if there were, it was shameful to have to avial yourself of them. Now, if kids don’t get a job, they either live with and mooch off their parents forever, or the government pays their way.

So, where is the incentive? Where are the consequences for irresponsibility?

]]> By: Jordan http://pjmedia.com/blog/the-peter-pan-myth-the-real-reason-men-wont-settle-down/#comment-491667 Jordan Fri, 12 Feb 2010 06:03:40 +0000 http://pajamasmedia.com/?p=39430#comment-491667 Men we have the upper hand: Don't get married - Get rich! You can bang 20 year olds till the day you die. Let the women die alone, broke, and as old hags. Men we have the upper hand:

Don’t get married – Get rich!

You can bang 20 year olds till the day you die. Let the women die alone, broke, and as old hags.

]]> By: PA http://pjmedia.com/blog/the-peter-pan-myth-the-real-reason-men-wont-settle-down/#comment-479515 PA Fri, 08 Jan 2010 21:30:24 +0000 http://pajamasmedia.com/?p=39430#comment-479515 It's funny reading all these comments and I haven't found one that didn't 'blame' the corporate culture. Before 70s feminism and its divorce laws, there was Hugh Hefner's Playboy. It was a projection of Hef's own issues about women and marriage, but since it was a mag, it had to sell. The image of the glamorous, unfettered man surrounded by willing females was used by alcohol, tobacco, clothing, perfume companies, etc -- you name it. It was a great formula to sell absolutely anything, and it is still being used to this day. As for 'immature' female obsessions. like shoes -- these are also part of corporate funding of 'popular culture' as depicted in tv shows (sex and the city, etc). You have to realize that these images of 'cool, fun' men and women are heavily funded by corporations intending to create consumerist addictions to their shows, their restaurants, their substances, shoes, anything. Unless the society maintains its connection to pre-industrial mores, there is no way it can be independent from corporate culture. Most non-American societies maintain such ties, inspite of their exposure to all this coporate inanity -- this is why the relations there between the sexes remain natural (or 'traditional' if you will). It is natural for one spouse, whatever the sex, to prefer to work and let the other watch the house and the kids, or, once separated, to provide for the welfare of the kids. It is not natural for both spouses to want to work and not spend time with their kids, or, once separated, to milk the other as some kind of corporate move. These latter types of behavior are the creation of the proliferation and domination of corporate values in American society. It’s funny reading all these comments and I haven’t found one that didn’t ‘blame’ the corporate culture. Before 70s feminism and its divorce laws, there was Hugh Hefner’s Playboy. It was a projection of Hef’s own issues about women and marriage, but since it was a mag, it had to sell. The image of the glamorous, unfettered man surrounded by willing females was used by alcohol, tobacco, clothing, perfume companies, etc — you name it. It was a great formula to sell absolutely anything, and it is still being used to this day. As for ‘immature’ female obsessions. like shoes — these are also part of corporate funding of ‘popular culture’ as depicted in tv shows (sex and the city, etc). You have to realize that these images of ‘cool, fun’ men and women are heavily funded by corporations intending to create consumerist addictions to their shows, their restaurants, their substances, shoes, anything. Unless the society maintains its connection to pre-industrial mores, there is no way it can be independent from corporate culture. Most non-American societies maintain such ties, inspite of their exposure to all this coporate inanity — this is why the relations there between the sexes remain natural (or ‘traditional’ if you will). It is natural for one spouse, whatever the sex, to prefer to work and let the other watch the house and the kids, or, once separated, to provide for the welfare of the kids. It is not natural for both spouses to want to work and not spend time with their kids, or, once separated, to milk the other as some kind of corporate move. These latter types of behavior are the creation of the proliferation and domination of corporate values in American society.

]]> By: Beenz http://pjmedia.com/blog/the-peter-pan-myth-the-real-reason-men-wont-settle-down/#comment-432988 Beenz Wed, 28 Oct 2009 23:56:53 +0000 http://pajamasmedia.com/?p=39430#comment-432988 I was born disabled and got little help. The women who should have nurtured me, abandoned me, leaving me disabled, so I say go out and work, liberated women, as I am on disability, now you can pay my way through life. Why work when women can support me? Why bother applying for work when these women won't hire a disabled man in the first place. Let the liberated women work, and support ME. I was born disabled and got little
help.

The women who should have nurtured
me, abandoned me, leaving me
disabled, so I say go out and
work, liberated women, as I am
on disability, now you can pay
my way through life.

Why work when women can support me?
Why bother applying for work when
these women won’t hire a disabled
man in the first place.

Let the liberated women work, and
support ME.

]]> By: gordo http://pjmedia.com/blog/the-peter-pan-myth-the-real-reason-men-wont-settle-down/#comment-237957 gordo Wed, 08 Apr 2009 21:49:04 +0000 http://pajamasmedia.com/?p=39430#comment-237957 Marrying an American woman is fraught with risk. The marriage is likely to end up being an experiment in social justice where the man loses no matter what he does or doesn't do. If kids come along, forget about it. The kids will come first, the man relegated to a walking paycheck. American women don't know how to treat a man, they have been taught to have it all, which means at his expense. For younger men who want a family, look overseas or to newly emigrated women from traditional families. Modern American women are dangerous and steeped in the philosophy that they come first. Oh,if you are looking for good intimacy, don't bother with the home-grown ladies. That's a lost art. Marrying an American woman is fraught with risk. The marriage is likely to end up being an experiment in social justice where the man loses no matter what he does or doesn’t do. If kids come along, forget about it. The kids will come first, the man relegated to a walking paycheck. American women don’t know how to treat a man, they have been taught to have it all, which means at his expense. For younger men who want a family, look overseas or to newly emigrated women from traditional families. Modern American women are dangerous and steeped in the philosophy that they come first. Oh,if you are looking for good intimacy, don’t bother with the home-grown ladies. That’s a lost art.

]]> By: Japanesewomenonly http://pjmedia.com/blog/the-peter-pan-myth-the-real-reason-men-wont-settle-down/#comment-237142 Japanesewomenonly Tue, 07 Apr 2009 22:08:53 +0000 http://pajamasmedia.com/?p=39430#comment-237142 I only Japanese women. I can't help it. Every time I look at Western women (regardless of race) I see a cute face but not a feminine persona. Women are acting like men in Western countries and it's a turn off. Good luck to the rest of you that want to eventually marry women like that...or even consider something like that. Dating Asian women have made me see what real women and real feminine power/attraction is. Have a nice day. I only Japanese women. I can’t help it. Every time I look at Western women (regardless of race) I see a cute face but not a feminine persona. Women are acting like men in Western countries and it’s a turn off.

Good luck to the rest of you that want to eventually marry women like that…or even consider something like that.

Dating Asian women have made me see what real women and real feminine power/attraction is.

Have a nice day.

]]> By: B. http://pjmedia.com/blog/the-peter-pan-myth-the-real-reason-men-wont-settle-down/#comment-207794 B. Sun, 22 Feb 2009 04:22:57 +0000 http://pajamasmedia.com/?p=39430#comment-207794 Oh, stop whining. I've spent my whole life being quiet, well-spoken, well-read, courteous, gentle, and considerate. I don't yell, swear, or break wind loudly (or think it's funny when others do.) I would have found Maxim crass and juvenalian when I was thirteen years old. I've always made an effort to be a good listener, a considerate helper, and a generous friend. In return, women have berated me, laughed in my face, demonstrated at best a considerable lack of good manners and at worst blatant disdain. Being a "nice guy" marks a man as a wimp deserving only of derision, while women consistently seek out - and often keep coming back to - the men who abuse them physically and emotionally. I actually had a first (and last) date with a woman who proudly displayed a bumper sticker on her SUV saying, "Men have feelings too - BUT WHO CARES?!" The date proceeded with her explanation of how, if I was "man enough" to date her, I would simply have to accept her vicious put-downs, manipulation, and emotional abuse as the price for dating someone so gorgeous. And yes, she WAS gorgeous. But, contrary to your old stereotypes, most men do NOT engage in belching contests, think flatulence is hilarious, or "think with their penises." So I told Miss Who Cares Thanks-but-no-thanks. Which just goes to show, in her eyes, what a wimp I am. I'm 41 and I'm sick of being manipulated. I know that generalizations are all bad, and that not all women are manipulative, self-centered, and just plain mean. If, by some spectacular miracle, I find that single woman, I'll probably marry her. In the meantime, don't tell ME how I'm just immature and afraid of commitment! Oh, stop whining.

I’ve spent my whole life being quiet, well-spoken, well-read, courteous, gentle, and considerate. I don’t yell, swear, or break wind loudly (or think it’s funny when others do.) I would have found Maxim crass and juvenalian when I was thirteen years old.

I’ve always made an effort to be a good listener, a considerate helper, and a generous friend.

In return, women have berated me, laughed in my face, demonstrated at best a considerable lack of good manners and at worst blatant disdain.

Being a “nice guy” marks a man as a wimp deserving only of derision, while women consistently seek out – and often keep coming back to – the men who abuse them physically and emotionally.

I actually had a first (and last) date with a woman who proudly displayed a bumper sticker on her SUV saying, “Men have feelings too – BUT WHO CARES?!”

The date proceeded with her explanation of how, if I was “man enough” to date her, I would simply have to accept her vicious put-downs, manipulation, and emotional abuse as the price for dating someone so gorgeous.

And yes, she WAS gorgeous. But, contrary to your old stereotypes, most men do NOT engage in belching contests, think flatulence is hilarious, or “think with their penises.”

So I told Miss Who Cares Thanks-but-no-thanks. Which just goes to show, in her eyes, what a wimp I am.

I’m 41 and I’m sick of being manipulated. I know that generalizations are all bad, and that not all women are manipulative, self-centered, and just plain mean. If, by some spectacular miracle, I find that single woman, I’ll probably marry her.

In the meantime, don’t tell ME how I’m just immature and afraid of commitment!

]]> By: PETER http://pjmedia.com/blog/the-peter-pan-myth-the-real-reason-men-wont-settle-down/#comment-174856 PETER Thu, 25 Dec 2008 19:24:36 +0000 http://pajamasmedia.com/?p=39430#comment-174856 IS THAT TRUE. IS THAT TRUE.

]]> By: Mike M http://pjmedia.com/blog/the-peter-pan-myth-the-real-reason-men-wont-settle-down/#comment-165737 Mike M Sat, 06 Dec 2008 20:55:53 +0000 http://pajamasmedia.com/?p=39430#comment-165737 Why is there such a debate on this blog the fact that no women are posting any comments on the situation where men have to face in divorce court simply means they know in a divorce they will hold all the cards and I don't believe this will change anytime soon so its a simple solution don't get married end of debate. Why is there such a debate on this blog the fact that no women are posting any comments on the situation where men have to face in divorce court simply means they know in a divorce they will hold all the cards and I don’t believe this will change anytime soon so its a simple solution
don’t get married end of debate.

]]> By: David http://pjmedia.com/blog/the-peter-pan-myth-the-real-reason-men-wont-settle-down/#comment-164105 David Wed, 03 Dec 2008 17:13:47 +0000 http://pajamasmedia.com/?p=39430#comment-164105 In case anybody thinks what Chris is saying above is fiction, check out what happened to this fellow from Massachusetts. Being mentioned by the ABA Journal no less: http://www.abajournal.com/news/former_big_firm_lawyer_now_unemployed_still_on_the_hook_for_alimony/ Gentelemen - marry at your own risk. It is a lose/lose proposition with today's (post-1970) laws. Your Civil Rights and the U.S. Constitution will mean nothing against the awesome dictatorial powers of the Family Court. We overthrew King George two centuries ago. But now we have a new king. All kneel before our new overlords ... the Divorce Industrial Complex. The Communist Party in the old USSR never had it so good. In case anybody thinks what Chris is saying above is fiction, check out what happened to this fellow from Massachusetts. Being mentioned by the ABA Journal no less:

http://www.abajournal.com/news/former_big_firm_lawyer_now_unemployed_still_on_the_hook_for_alimony/

Gentelemen – marry at your own risk. It is a lose/lose proposition with today’s (post-1970) laws. Your Civil Rights and the U.S. Constitution will mean nothing against the awesome dictatorial powers of the Family Court. We overthrew King George two centuries ago. But now we have a new king. All kneel before our new overlords … the Divorce Industrial Complex. The Communist Party in the old USSR never had it so good.

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