Liberals Are Mostly Not Exactly Like Terrorists
It is often said about terrorism: “They only have to win once; we have to win every time.” That’s the most daunting part about stopping people who want to cause death and mayhem and have no concern for their own lives. We have to be one hundred percent perfect on stopping them, because if they succeed even once it’s a catastrophe. Looking at it that way, it’s almost a miracle we haven’t had more large-scale attacks on our home soil. Still, the terrorists will keep trying, and it seems almost inevitable that one day we’ll slip up again, and they’ll succeed.
It’s a lot like that with liberals. They keep coming at us with their new giant government programs, and conservatives have to defeat them every time. If we ever fail to block a new entitlement just once, then society will soon adjust around it, and it will permanently take root. After that, removing the entitlement would be like ripping a bottle away from a baby — politically infeasible. It’s there forever. Thus conservatives have to block liberals one hundred percent of the time, and if we as a country ever slip up and let liberals pass their giant new plans even once, we’re damaged forever. That’s why conservatives are so upset about the passage of ObamaCare.
So are liberals just like terrorists? Now, most people, when asked that question, would immediately answer, “Why, yes, of course.” All the obvious parallels are there. Both terrorists and liberals have an utter disdain for the average American, hate America and wish to destroy its freedoms, hate all our military interventions in the Middle East, dislike Israel, are suspicious of American patriotism, and are foul smelling. Plus, Americans would feel much safer if both were locked up somewhere in Cuba. Also, I don’t know if anyone else has noticed this, but the names of the leaders of the liberals and the terrorists are sort of similar: Osama and Obama.
No? Well, I thought they sounded alike.
Furthermore, both groups employ the strategy of suicide attacks. Terrorists will kill themselves to hurt Americans for the promise of sexy dames in the afterlife. Liberals in Congress appear willing to commit political suicide by cramming an unpopular health care bill down America’s throat for the promise of later living in a utopia where all the smart people like them get to make all the big decisions for everybody — the secular version of paradise.
So it does seem that liberals are exactly like terrorists, but I’m once again going to be the contrarian and say they are actually quite different. Yes, I wish it were so simple as treating liberals and terrorists the same and taking out the staff of Media Matters with a predator drone strike, but that’s not reality. The differences between liberals and terrorists are very important.
For one thing, what do we do when we capture terrorists? That’s right: We waterboard them to get them to talk and tell us where their base is or what their secret plans are or what their favorite color is. Terrorists have information we need. With liberals, we’ll do anything we can to keep them from talking. They talk way too much as it is and often in venues where it’s completely unwelcome, and we’d just as soon waterboard ourselves as listen to them (which is the problem MSNBC has with ratings). Plus, it’s not like they have any secret plans we don’t know about. What are they going to tell us if we waterboard them?
“I’ll admit it! ObamaCare is the first step towards single-payer and a complete government takeover of health care!”
Who doesn’t know that? Liberals are too dim-witted and too arrogant to keep any of their thoughts secret. As we learned with Obama, if we want to find out what liberals really think of Americans, we just have to slip a tape recorder into a fundraiser with elites in San Francisco.
Another difference between liberals and terrorists are sleeper cells — terrorists could have infiltrated American society and be waiting to attack. Liberals, on the other hand, are completely incapable of associating with normal Americans. Remember when John Kerry tried to go hunting to appear like an American? If only terrorist sleeper agents were that obvious and awkward.
This raises the whole competency issue, which is another big difference. Terrorists can use guns, make bombs, and survive in caves. Liberals are scared of loud noises and apparently can’t survive if their every need isn’t provided for by the federal government. And while Obama and Osama sound very much like each other, what’s their biggest difference? That’s right: Osama had actually demonstrated leadership abilities before being put in charge.
The biggest and most important difference between liberals and terrorists is this: Terrorists will never actually be able to defeat America, while liberals most likely will eventually succeed. Terrorists can kill people and destroy property, but those idiots are never actually going to defeat America in this universe. The worst they can do is make us so panicked and scared that we nuke the crap out of everybody, but we’ll still be around after that.
Liberals, despite their idiocy and incompetency, will probably topple America one day if history is any guide. As I said before, anytime they succeed and get a new government program through our defenses, it’s there forever. We can swat down their ideas most of the time, but eventually, if just by sheer luck of circumstances, they succeed. The New Deal, Great Society, ObamaCare — they just keep adding to the size of government, and no political force is able to remove entitlements once they’re entrenched in society.
Eventually they’ll make the government so bloated it will crush itself under its own weight like a beached whale. Then there goes America, and there go all our hopes and dreams. The only consolation is that, no longer having the government to take care of them, all liberals will freeze to death come the first winter. Still, there goes America for good, thanks to liberals.
Pretty scary thought, huh? And don’t think the terrorists haven’t noticed. Remember what Osama talked about in his latest video? “Climate change” and the drastic steps nations are going to have to take to combat it, i.e., more government controls. Al-Qaeda is trading bombs for what they know will truly destroy the Great Satan: Obama’s rhetoric.
So are terrorists like liberals? They’re getting there.
Of course liberals are candy a$$es.
Terrorists may not be like liberals, but they certainly do like liberals.
Then again, maybe they don’t like liberals. I mean, if you tried for years to do something, then a bunch of ass-clowns came along and stumbled and bumbled their way into accomplishing what you couldn’t, you might be pissed.
Could have been a really good column, but the bit about Obama/Osama (even if Ted Kennedy said it first) and the predator drone put it way over the top.
Liberals are very much “not like” terrorists. As is obvious every time liberals are in charge.
Even with the full weight of our military power at their beck and call, liberals are consistently incapable of dealing effectively with terrorists. They may use more cruise missiles than conservatives, or hit more places with AGMs fired from Predators, but they have consistent problems with target selection. Generally, given the choice between what looks good on the six-thirty news and something which will actually damage the terrorists’ operations, the liberals will go for the flashy footage every time.
Also, consider that while liberals are consistently ineffective at war-fighting even compared to terrorists (who overall are not effective in the actual goal of war- to change the enemy’s behavior), they do sympathize with the terrorists who infest our world today.
Like the terrorists, they hate Western Civilization.
like the terrorists, they really hate Israel as an outpost of that civilization in what both lots regard as the “enlightened” part of the world (the part still ruled by mysticism, which ‘feels good” to them).
Like the terrorists, they identify themselves as “champions of the downtrodden”- which in their definition consists mainly of groups like the Palestinians, most of whose problems are self-inflicted due to following the tenets of a backward, damaged culture they refuse to change.
And also like the terrorists, they believe that they are absolutely right, all the time- even when the facts say otherwise.
This probably explains why their anti-terrorist efforts are largely ineffectual. Their dogma calls on them to admire and sympathize with the terrorists, while their desire to retain power over America tells them that most Americans do not share their schoolboy crush on same. Seen in this light, they are caught in a cleft stick of their own making.
In Obama’s policies we see the latest “progressive” attempt to reconcile these two fundamentally non-reconcilable viewpoints. He carries out pinprick attacks with Predators, while doing his best to hamstring Israel and neutralize our own military. He speaks of “soft power”, while exercising exactly no power abroad, other than the power to backstab our allies (Poland, the Czech Republic, Honduras- the list is long) while cozying up to people who will never like us, no matter what we do or do not do. (Think Iran’s government.) And he vents his wrath on those who disagree with him, no matter how mildly, at home, whom he regards as the “main enemy”. His, perhaps- but not the nation’s.
And the rest of the “enlightened ones” are nothing but a Greek chorus, cheering him on. They haven’t thought of the long term consequences of their infatuations, and don’t really care. On the grounds that (A) they are “right”, so everything will be “good”, and (B) if it all goes to Hades in the next generation, they won’t have to deal with it- it will be “somebody else’s problem”. (Just like their attitudes on deficits.)
No, liberals are not like terrorists. If terrorists behaved this stupidly, they would all have been extinct long ago.
clear ether
eon
“For one thing, what do we do when we capture terrorists? That’s right: We waterboard them to get them to talk and tell us where their base is or what their secret plans are or what their favorite color is. Terrorists have information we need.”
- and just like that *poof* this article loses all credibility.
Coming from someone who has supported our soldiers and is against the ever growing federal government in this country, torture is NEVER to be allowed. Period. And yes, it IS torture.
If we can’t defeat our enemies without compromising our humanity, then what’s the point?
Survival?
No it is not torture. Period. Lose our “humanity?” Waterboarding has no lasting physical effects and is used to scare the crap out of the terrorist. Sleep deprivation is more injurious. Evil is not to be played with, it is to be killed. Instead of losing our “humanity,” maybe you should be more worried about losing a city.
Mike in KC, MO:
Really? I had credibility up until that point?
Another dim wit who dosn’t understand satire. Don’t worry Frank we never think of you as credible back at IMAO.
You define humanity differently than I do, Mike. These are illegal combatants who do not fight in accordance with the laws of the Geneva Conventions and target civilians (or would if our troops weren’t over there, bringing the fight to them). There’s nothing inhuman about getting a bit rough with them (maybe against the current law, but not inhuman) to get information from them.
Besides that, if we can’t compromise your view of what is human in order to defeat them, what’s the point? Easiest answer in the world – to stop them from killing us.
I’m not one who is normally fond of violence. Hell, if I had to hunt for my food, I’d be dead, because I would feel sorry for the animals. However, when predators of a different variety come after me, my loved ones, or my country, the LAST thing I’m worried about is some weak-kneed, wobbly vision of what is nice and not nice.
Personally, I notice a very close resemblance between and among terrorists, liberals, people who disagree with awesome writers, and hippies. The common characteristic shared by this group is their need to be punched frequently and repeatedly. It won’t change them or their obnoxious ideas, but it makes the puncher feel a lot better.
Another great article Frank. Thanks.
Frank,
I can always count on your columns to make me laugh no matter how bad things seem. Thanks for all you do!
-Joyce
It’s funny how we love to label movements. For instance, before the 1949 establishment of Israel (or reconstitution of the Promised Land), Haganah was/is considered a “freedom seeking” organization, when in actuality they supported the Irgun who in 1948 blew up the King David Hotel in Jerusalem (widely acknowledged as a terrorist act). From the Arab point of view, Haganah & Irgun were terrorist organizations seeking to toppel the existing legitimate government.
My point is: one man’s “terrorist” is another man’s “freedom fighter”. BOTH employ the same or similar tactics.
There is a way to destroy entitlement programs, but it requires a crisis first. Once we’re bankrupt, then we can rip away all their entitlement programs all at once, because there is no money to pay for them. Try as they might, they can’t fund programs with money that doesn’t exist.
Liberals might not fit your definition of terrorist, but their goals are the same. They want the destruction of this country and as soon as possible. Saying that, we should treat them in the same manner no holds barred.
Mike in KC, MO (5):
…
Coming from someone who has supported our soldiers and is against the ever growing federal government in this country, torture is NEVER to be allowed. Period. And yes, it IS torture.
So? One fundamental purpose of government is to protect its citizenry from outside attack. Intensive interrogation is not used for “fishing expeditions”, or against your own citizens, it’s used when you’ve captured an enemy on the field and know that he knows something – which you must find out to stop further actions against your countrymen.
Criminals are members of your own society that knowingly go against the agreed-upon norms of that society, and are justly condemned according to those rules. Most times the criminals themselves know this, which is why conventional police interrogation tactics work. Terrorists, like any other enemy combatants, are working within the societal constraints of their own society. By their own rules, they are not doing anything wrong!
Furthermore, criminals do not attack the society per se, they attack individuals within that society. Enemy combatants, on the other hand, are attacking the society itself; individuals within that society are secondary considerations.
Morality determines our behavior to others within our society, and those from other societies that visit our land in friendship (if you visit another country, you behave – as far as possible – according to the norms of that society). If I am attacked by a robber or thief, I am fully justified in using deadly force to defend myself. By attacking our society itself, terrorists forfeit any claim to moral behavior by members of our society. Now we may choose – in the interests of not losing our own humanity – to limit our choice of tactics, but the emphasis must be on defending the members of our society. It does us little good to die morally!
Frank, the best things about your articles are the comments from people that take everything you say so seriously. I always think it’s funny when people say we can’t sacrifice our “humanity.” I just want one person to define humanity that is actually an accurrate descriptor of humans.
Geez, Frank – were you listening in on my private thoughts this AM?
The drones sucking of the government’s teat may freeze to death in the first hard winter, but they aren’t the ones centralizing power; they’re merely the useful idiots who enable it.
The people we have to worry about are the autocrats, and their thugs who they use to take power in the first place. And frankly, just because the current crop of liberals is scared of loud noises doesn’t mean the US doesn’t have it’s own crop of thugs willing to inflict violence to get what they want, and when the rule of law finally collapses, they will certainly be ready to step into the power vacuum that creates.
Voyager
Hilarious Frank! I suppose we will also shortly find out if they can laugh at themselves or not.
“And yes, it IS torture.”
Gee, I guess we’d better stop doing to our folks going through survival training then, huh?
And if it IS torture, as you so confidently state, then why did Sen. John McCain vote AGAINST the ban on waterboarding? I think he would know what constitutes torture. He may have said a great many things in the politics of waterboarding, but when the tires met the pavement so to speak, and he had to actually make his feelings on the subject known, he voted against the ban.
You fail, Mike in KC. And you are awarded no points. Sorry about that.
The only thing I’d change about this article is the nomenclature. The term “liberal” needs to be deprecated and more apt terms should be used in its stead.
It’s time to start calling a spade a spade.
Brilliant article… The funniest part is all the commenters who took it literally!
I think terrorists are like terriers. You might think I’d make some ankle-biting comparison, but terrorists are most like terriers because they are hairy. And if you throw a ball with a bell in it near a terrorist, he will stop jihading and go chase it. (Little known fact).
Frank, you nailed the part of the battle that explains Obama’s stated preference for one good term versus two bad ones. “Good” in Obama speak translates to maximal amount of irreversible change.
He seems quite messianic, and I think that a misquoting of the Bible explains his philosophy: He knows that we will have unemployment with us forever, but we will have Him for only four years.
In other words, the problems of the country don’t matter–we’ll always have them. What matters is the creation of new institutions and entitlements that cannot be destroyed. That’s his idea of a good one term presidency.
“Eventually they’ll make the government so bloated it will crush itself under its own weight like a beached whale.”
I once asked my conservative mentor, “How long does it usually take for a nation to recover after is has become a welfare state?”
His answer was, “Ask the Roman Empire.”
goy
Sorry, but someone who is a coward, fraud, and a liar cannot be taken seriously. In the article linked below:
http://pajamasmedia.com/blog/high-drama-amid-obamacare-threats/#comments-72
you were caught lying several times. The worst time was in post #72 where you suggested that you are a veteran. I’ve asked you repeatedly to name when and with what unit you served. You’ve repeatedly refused to answer those questions. A real veteran would be able to do so. It’s pathetic that you could be so cowardly as to pretend to be a veteran. Your comments cannot be taken seriously.
“…[A]nd are foul-smelling.”
Now, now … (hehe)
Satire-ific!
Personally, I think it gives liberals way too much credit to assign them the resourcefulness shown by actual terrorists.
Terrorists, at least, operate by direct action. Liberals operate by the slow emission of corrosive ooze — equally harmful, but over a longer (and thus less noticeable) time.
Mike in KC, MO
So pouring water on them is torture, what do you call dropping 500LB bombs on their heads? I’m pretty sure I know which one I’d choose but maybe you’re right, more 500LB bombs = less “torture” we need to do, it’ll save a lot of water too since once it’s poured on them it becomes liberal smelling toxic waste.
Didn’t even need to read the by-line. Knew it was Frank J. as soon as I got a paragraph in! LOL!
I still remember the “In My World” 2004 Bush/Kerry debate where Bush drags in a bunch of skulls and tosses them out to the audience. LOL!
goy, I think Mr. Independent is coming on to you.
This post has been linked for the HOT5 Daily 3/31/2010, at The Unreligious Right
“Liberals are scared of loud noises and apparently can’t survive if their every need isn’t provided for by the federal government.”
They also wet the bed.
“….for the promise of sexy dames in the afterlife.”
Not sure the sexy part is a valid assumption there, Frank. After all,there must be some reason they died as virgins.
In their fundamental premises (anti-reason, collectivism, etc), they’re identical.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. LOOK AT THE BIG PICTURE!!!
You know I am always amazed by this selfish mentality people like you have. Just thinking about yourself and others that think like you. You people just don’t see the big picture. You see it as socialism and government take over. You don’t see it as being a better world where people are helped out of their suffering that haven’t been taught how to avoid the trappings of poverty because no one they knew were ever taught about it . So there for they can’t teach it to them. Once people get better educated on why people are in the position they are in through no fault of their own and see the big picture it will become clear to them that things will only get better when people stop thinking of themselves and start thinking of the well being of their fellow man.
05 Apr 2010 um 2:02 pm
Johnnie,
It’s not as if you can help yourself. You are incapable of seeing reality. Liberals, I’ve jousted with, have blamed Pol Pot’s bloodbath, on his being a CIA agent. Trig Palin caused that little fire in an EVIL SUV, in New York, a couple weeks ago. The vehicle was almost as responsible as Trig.
Bumper Stinker in Gayvermont, the other day…WELL, AT LEAST THE WAR ON THE NVIREMINT IS GOING WELL! Sniff, sniff, whine, swoon.
If you and I were standing in a deluge of a rainstorm, and I said…I’m afraid I’m going to drown, you would go put on sun tan lotion, shades and a swim suit, and complain about the heat. You are a Contrarian, and you cain’t hep it.
You hate to talk about politics and religion, because they are the same thing to you. The Big OH, is a pathetic, emotionally stunted poseur. And, by the murder of God, you got the little twink, elected. You’ve WON! Quit whining(LOL!)
By Lyle H. Rossiter, Jr. MD
Dr. Lyle H.Rossiter, Jr., a forensic psychiatrist, explains the
madness of liberalism in his new book The Liberal Mind: The
Psychological Causes of Political Madness. You can read an excerpt
below, and read more at his website http://www.libertymind.com
It does not learn history’s lessons on the evils of collectivism.
What the liberal mind is passionate about is a world filled with
pity, sorrow, neediness, misfortune, poverty, suspicion, mistrust,
anger, exploitation, discrimination, victimization, alienation and
injustice.
Those who occupy this world are “workers,” “minorities,” “the little
guy,” “women,” and the “unemployed.”
They are poor, weak, sick, wronged, cheated, oppressed,
disenfranchised, exploited and victimized. They bear no
responsibility for their problems.
None of their agonies are attributable to faults or failings of their
own: not to poor choices, bad habits, faulty judgment, wishful thinking,
lack of ambition, low frustration tolerance, mental illness or
defects in character.
The quality of your arguments is very low, lol.
Coming soon, Why Firemen are almost exactly like Terrorists.
Why the Bartender is almost exactly like a Terrorist.
Why Bush was very nearly a Terrorist.
Why the Pope is similar to a Terrorist.
The Seven Traits of a Highly Effective Terrorist.
Howdy Doody was a Terrorist.
The Bugs Bunny manual of Terrorism.
Walt Disney’s secret plot to Terrorize Tinkerbell.
Watch the Dog, she might very nearly almost be a Terrorist.
Donnie,
Leftism is a godless religion. You worship each other and your sheer brilliance. Leftism is also a mental illness, called, Pathological Narcissism.*
…For example, a state agency called the N K V D was watching those applauding that day (for Comrade FDR’s Uncle Jo) to see who might be OPPOSING Josef and his IDEAL SOCIETY (UTOPIA.) The first ones to cease applauding and sit down were identified as INDEPENDENT THINKERS, A DANGER TO THE STATE. Many went to prison, some were executed, all in the name of a PERFECT SOCIETY THAT WOULD ELIMINATE PAIN AND SUFFERING. “Signs Of The Times” Feb.,10
*Pathological narcissism(EVIL) is a reaction to prolonged abuse and trauma in early childhood or early adolescence. The source of the abuse or trauma is immaterial: the perpetrators could be dysfunctional or absent parents, teachers, other adults, or peers…
You are, The Catcher In The Rye, who wishes go grab everybody, and give them a great big hug…That is, of course, with the exception of the people you LOATHE. Me, frinstance, your parents, The Orkin Man, our military, anybody that you perceive to have more than ewe do.
Haven’t you got a planet to go save, Cupcake? BOO!
And, Frank…The Evil Flower Children Of The Damned/Body Statchers, didn’t get the joke.* They are incapable of humor, unless, it’s Tony Snow, or Jerry Ford, dying.
http://i257.photobucket.com/albums/hh205/dishmael_bucket/children_of_damned_poster_04.jpg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=na2W38tLp_Q&feature=player_embedded
*Liberals Are Mostly Not Exactly Like Terrorists
A Liberal’s reaction to hearing that Jerry Falwell has died.
http://i257.photobucket.com/albums/hh205/dishmael_bucket/LAUGHINGMOVIE-1.gif
Huffington Post will quote you to prove you are a terrorist:
“taking out the staff of Media Matters with a predator drone strike”